


Clearest Blue

by crackedeggie



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotions, Eventual Sex, F/F, Romance, Slow Burn, and very gay, spoilers for the game, they're in love okay
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-03
Updated: 2017-05-12
Packaged: 2018-10-14 09:45:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 25,659
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10533939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crackedeggie/pseuds/crackedeggie
Summary: Peebee never expected to fall in love with Ryder. Ryder never expected to fall in love with Peebee. And they both do everything to deny their feelings for each other.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This will contain spoilers for the game, just a heads up! Definitely planning on updating this on a regular basis, I just need to stop bouncing around in my writing. Enjoy! I have infinite amount of love for Peebee and it's a problem.

Even in her most ludicrous daydreams, Ryder never even came close to imagining what her actual reality was going to be in the Andromeda universe. She never expected the golden worlds to be a bust, she never expected to become the pathfinder, she never expected the Nexus to be such a shitshow, and she definitely didn’t expect to be knocked down by an Asari while investigating a Remnant site. And yet here she was with an Asari straddling her. 

“Whoa! Take it easy! You’ve come this far, just let it ride,” the Asari said with her hands up. 

“I’ve been studying this tech for months. I don’t know how you activated those glyphs, but you have to let them cycle through their channels. It’s going to be alright. Trust me, okay?”

Ryder was so completely startled that she just gaped at the Asari as she removed herself and stood up. Whoever she was, she was stunning, but then again all the Asari were gorgeous to her. She was different though; she looked a bit rougher and more trim but Ryder supposed that being out here in these conditions would do that to anyone. 

“I know, I know — who am I? I’m Peebee. I mean it’s obvious who you are. I saw the ship swoop in…you’re a pathfinder. Was beginning to think the Initiative made you guys up so the rest of us wouldn’t lose hope, but you’re real, huh?”

Hopeful eyes. Hopeful, green eyes stare at Ryder. She thinks beautiful but quickly dismisses it. The Asari had black paint smeared across her eyes. Ryder’s eyes wandered to take in her outfit, the purple jacket with sturdy black pants but she quickly stopped herself. She needed to focus and get back in the game and actually say something before anything else happens. 

“Maybe you want to knock me down a couple more times to make sure?” Ryder said as she rolled her eyes. 

“No, that’s okay. You’re obviously corporeal — pretty solidly built, actually.” Does this Asari have absolutely no filter? 

The machines around them started making noises and lighting up from the bottom all the way to the top of the structures towering over them. A beam of light burst from the top and pointed towards the middle of the lake but that could just be an educated guess. 

“Well look at that,” Peebee said and whistled. 

“System has stabilized. I’m establishing a connection,” SAM announced. 

“Ah crap!” Peebee shouted and shot right past Ryder’s head. The shot hit an observer which crashed into the ground and fractured into several pieces. The sound rung in Ryder’s ears as she clutched them with a yell. There was little time to focus on the pain when suddenly the group was ambushed by several Remnant bots. Everyone immediately grabbed their preferred weapon of choice and started taking them down.  
“Shit, sorry Ryder! I just didn’t want it to shoot you,” Peebee immediately apologized for before and rushed over. “But that wasn’t bad! My first tangle with the Remnant was a lot messier!” What a dweeb.

—

After the fight with the Remnant, they carried onto the next monolith and activated it. Excitement and anticipation coursed through Ryder’s body. They were so close to finding out what made this planet tick, so close to figuring out a way to make this world habitable. This is why she had joined up with the Initiative, discovering the unknown and making a new name for herself. 

“Alright guys, let’s join up with Peebee” Ryder said grinning.

“Are we sure we can trust her?” Cora asked. 

“Well, she’s proven useful so far so it doesn’t make sense killing her just yet,” Vetra commented. 

“Hey now, no one said anything about killing her!” Ryder said scowling at her. 

“It was a joke,” Vetra said with a deadpan look. 

Ryder sighed as she climbed back into the Nomad and switched the controls on. She loves her team, she loves her team, she loves her team. And if they drove towards the centre of the lake over a few bumps while speeding, she definitely didn’t have anything to do with that. 

—

“No. No, this can’t be right. All that fanfare for an empty room?” Peebee said frustrated. “There’s some secret here. There must be. Do your pathfinder thing!” 

Suddenly the floor opened up in the middle of the room before Ryder could actually do anything. 

“Oh you’re good,” Peebee said to the room or….Ryder? Ryder wasn’t sure. 

“And I make it look so easy,” Ryder said jokingly. She couldn’t resist. 

The group stared at the open space in the middle of the floor. What were they supposed to do with this now? Ryder kicked a rock into the space to see how deep it went but curiously the rock didn’t just plummet to the bottom, it floated slowly down. 

“That can’t be air pressure. Electrostatic? Ah, gravitation! Oh, you idiot, Peebee. That wasn’t the front door. This is!” Peebee exclaimed excitedly. 

Ryder couldn’t help but grin, Peebee’s enthusiasm was so infectious. _Get it together, Ryder_. But she had a short period of scolding herself when she noticed that Peebee was gearing herself up to jump down. And before she could even say anything, there Peebee went running. 

“Come on Pathfinder!” Peebee shouted as she jumped into the air and down into the gravity well. 

Ryder stupidly stared after Peebee, shocked really that the Asari had the gall to jump down with such little regard for the consequences. She was such a surprising alien. And at that moment Ryder took a leap and jumped down, closing her eyes. The gravity well caught her and she was slowly brought down. She had never felt so light before, what an incredible experience. This had to bring them closer to the atmospheric processor. Once they all had reached the bottom, they started walking down the massive hallways until Peebee stumbled upon a small artifact of Remnant technology lying on the floor. “Huh, I wonder if this is a symbol of authority or a key? I’ll see what I can find on this beauty. Maybe over this way.”

“Whatever has this on lockdown is the other way,” Ryder said, pointing in the opposite way. Was Peebee completely tuning her out?

“I do my best work solo. You fix up the vault, I’ll investigate the relic, and we’ll figure this place out,” Peebee shrugged dusting off her pistol. 

“Have you never seen a horror movie before? Splitting up isn’t a good idea.”

“Yeah but we cover twice the amount of ground that way. Anyway stay safe! I’ll be on frequency 145.8.”

And with that Peebee ran up a few steps and disappeared. The trio started advancing towards the main controls, or so they were hoping. There wasn’t a ton of time to chat as almost every step of the way they ran into more and more Remnants. Maybe that was a sign they were getting close. After about 20 minutes Peebee checked in saying, “Yeah so, that object I picked up? Not a piece of authority. Turns out the Remnant will still shoot at you!” This entire squad was going to be the death of Ryder, not these Remnants or the Archon. 

As they continued going deeper and deeper into the vault, Ryder couldn’t help noticing how clean everything looked. As if this place had been sealed off for god knows how long. SAM interrupted her thoughts to inform her that from his readings it seems that the place had been abandoned for at least several centuries. Maybe around the time that the Scourge appeared. Useful speculation. They continued further and deeper into the vault, continuing to fight Remnant along the way. They better be getting close. They were all starting to feel a little worn out. Another door unlocked and in the centre of it was a strong vibrant beam of light emerging from the floor and going all the way to the top of the ceiling. 

“This must be the heart of the vault,” Ryder said excitedly. She located the lockdown console and started it up. 

“The system lockdown is disabled. The vault, and the atmosphere processor, should return to full operation,” SAM announced. 

Static fizzed from her communicator and Peebee chimed in, “Ryder? You fixed the lockdown didn’t you? The whole place is lighting up. My readings are off the chart! Really…really off the chart…”

“But if it’s back online, we should be good… to…” Ryder started to trail off as smoke rose up and started moving towards them, slowly decimating the few plants that resided in the room. 

“Ryder,” Vetra said impatiently. 

“Go!” Ryder shouted and started running out the room, trying to wave her teammates to follow her. “Everyone run! Peebee get back to the entrance!”

“What the fuck is that thing?” Peebee yelled back. 

“Don’t risk it. Just run!” Ryder shouted back as adrenaline starts pumping through her system. The whole group was sprinting towards the exit. As they neared the entrance to the Vault, Ryder didn’t see Peebee anywhere in her field of vision. “We’ve almost cleared the place. Where are you Peebee? Hello? Peebee?” 

Out of the corner of the room she saw a blur of blue and purple rush out. Peebee sprinted over a chunk of stone while simultaneously shooting at an Observer. Ryder was just becoming more and more impressed with this Asari. As they reached the door they halted, confused by why it wasn’t opening. The smoke was nearing them. Ryder desperately ran back to the console in the room hoping to reboot the system, they were not going to die in here. Abso-fucking-lutey not. The console responded to Ryder and in a minute the smoke cleared out of the room. Her heart had never beat so fucking fast. 

Peebee came up to Ryder grinning like a gigantic fool. “Talk about a rush!” This human could be really interesting to follow. Not to mention, she was able to interface with the Remnants so easily - she needed to find out how. 

“Nothing like outrunning death!” Ryder replied laughing. Her laughter was infectious to Peebee, she started laughing right along. 

“I’m going to die underground in some fault somewhere because I work with two adrenaline junkies,” Vetra said dryly. 

Ryder rolled her eyes, “We can dial back the melodrama back a notch Vetra.”

“Atmosphere processor is online. Recovering last console activity,” SAM announces. 

A map of the Andromeda galaxy lit up in the room and Ryder stared at it, pointing at one of the small dots. “Hey, that’s Eos. If this light is us, al these other points could be vaults on other worlds. Dormant, like this one.”

“Maybe. But why is there a whole network of them? What’s this all for?” Peebee wonders. “That’s different. Maybe that one’s active? We’ve got to go and see.” She said pointing to a point in the room that was vibrant. 

“Alright. Mark it down SAM. And then we’re going to get some fresh air,” Ryder said, feeling relieved that at least one thing was completed on her endless to-do list. They all walked outside, in awe that the atmosphere processor had already improved the environment so drastically. 

“The planet is viable enough for an outpost Pathfinder,” Sam mentioned. Ryder wanted to pump her fist into the air and yell, but she thought it would be best to leave that for her bedroom.

“That site on the map is active though. Who knows what we’ll find there?” Peebee continued speculating. 

Ryder blinked in surprise. “We? You want to come along?”

“I want to know what makes the Remnant tick. You’ve got a key to their technology - or a crowbar, at least,” Peebee said bursting with energy. “Anyway, I’ll see you on the ship!” Well, that was that, Ryder supposed. Not that she really objected. Peebee was going to be unexpected and thrilling. 

—

“Saw we have a stowaway,” Lexis commented as she started patching up Ryder’s wounds.

“You mean Peebee?” Ryder asked surprised. She didn’t think the entire crew had the chance yet to run into Peebee, but then again Peebee might have ran into everyone else. 

“She’s decided to set up in one of the escape pods. You don’t need a psychologist to tell you that one’s got commitment issues,” Lexi continued as she handed Ryder a small tub of medicinal ointment. “And apply that every few hours to help with the bruising. It should take care of them in a day or so.” 

Ryder fell quiet thinking about what Lexi had said. She quickly nodded and stood up with a wince. Commitment issues. She opened the door and walked back to her room to reflect on what the fuck was going on with her emotions. As she unlocked her room she couldn’t help but relax a bit when she caught sight of the view outside her window, each time it was stunning. The door locked and Ryder crashed onto her bed, still staring outside the window. 

Why did it upset her? What Lexi had said? Ryder sighed. Maybe it was just because her team was finally coming together and she really didn’t want the dynamic to change. She definitely had not expected a rogue Asari and a grizzled old Krogan to join her team today but this mixed group of weirdos made her feel at peace. It made her feel like she could do what she was being asked by the Initiative. A smile appeared on her face as she let out a sigh and closed her eyes. Today had been a big day. Today had been a big and good day for so many people. They had an outpost on Eos. Finally they had a functioning outpost and this was a start. 

Ryder rolled over and opened her eyes. On her night stand was a picture frame face down. She picked it up and looked at the faces of her family. Sadness creeped over her as she thought about her mother, her father’s death, and the lack of Scott’s presence. Loneliness settled in her chest and squeezed.

“Hey guys. We found an outpost. We’re going to be okay here in Andromeda,” Ryder whispered to the photo. She gave them a weak smile and put the frame face down again.

Yeah, her team was starting to feel like a new family. She didn’t want to lose any of them. Including the weird little blue alien.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just dweebs being dweebs. I finally finished the next chapter instead of continuing the end of the story! Used some dialogue from the game and interpreted it on my own. Enjoy!

After the first team meeting, everyone went off into their own separate quarters to relax. Ryder decided it’d be a good opportunity to walk around and just check in with everyone. She knocked outside of Peebee’s room, excited to see her again. No, no, excited just to have the team in place. Ryder was finally feeling the confidence she kept shoving in everyone’s faces. Peebee opened the door and let her in. 

“You’re setting up in here huh?” Ryder asked her while looking around the pod. 

“Yeah I’m going through what we got out of that vault earlier. If I can crack this data storage box, it’ll help with a personal project back on the Nexus. It’s a nice out-of-the-way place where I can tinker, and I could sleep anywhere really. It’s not exactly homey, but I like that about it. Not really looking for a home. But I will help you find everyone a home! While I’m with you, at least,” Peebee replied. 

“Does your brain ever take a breath?” Ryder said jokingly. She didn’t really know how else to respond. She was just going to focus on the mission and worry about people leaving when they were, well, leaving. Or dead she supposed. God, this job really brought out the optimist in her. 

“Uh, sorry, not really. But I get it. You want to know what who’s on your ship, so you’re here to figure out what makes me tick, right? Well, I was born in a log cabin on rural Hyetiana to simple but loving parents just trying to…” Peebee pretended to nod off and faked a snore. “I look forward, not back Ryder. Why snooze through my life story? Get to know me out in the field while we’re uncovering the mysteries of this galaxy. That’s why I’m here. Got tired of yawning back home.”

Ryder understood the impulse to focus on the future and not on her past. Her past wasn’t exactly one to tell stories of either. She raised her eyebrows and replied, “Tackling complete strangers in the Milky Way wasn’t doing it for you?”

“I think tackling you anywhere would be fun…did I say that out loud? Life won’t be boring with you around. I may never yawn again,” Peebee winked at her. How was she so charming to Ryder? This Asari was going to be the death of her, she knew it.

“Well maybe you needed more sleep,” Ryder jabbed at her. 

“We were out for 600 years. A special someone made the trip with me and she woke up a different person. I’ve slept enough. Ryder, the Milky way was so…been-there-done-that. Even if I hadn’t done it, someone else had. If there’s one thing you should know about me, it’s that I live for the unknown; the never-been-done,” Peebee said excitedly and turned to stare outside her window, quieting down a little. The mention of someone special winded Ryder a bit, but again, she shook it off and told herself off for assuming anything.

“Well congratulate yourself. No one has ever so successfully dodged my attempts to get to know them,” Ryder said with a slow clap. 

“Yeah! I’m number one! Buy me a drink sometime who knows what will spill out of my mouth. On the other hand, I need Remnant scrap — Rem-Tech I’m calling it — for projects like this one I mentioned. Which I know you’ll love, by the by. Promise to bring me what you scrounge and I’ll submit to all your questions,” Peebee said with…a seductive look? That was a seductive look right? In all fairness, Ryder had been going on for at least 27 hours without sleep. She needed to sleep. She said goodbye to Peebee before going out to checking with the rest of the crew. 

—  
Peebee was bursting with excitement. She had a purpose here! The chance of actually discovering something unknown was plausible in this galaxy! She was going to make a difference here. The few pieces of Rem-Tech she had collected stood, scattered all across her desk. It was a challenge designed just for her; her challenge to take it apart and understand how it worked. And on the corner of her desk stood a piece of Rem-Tech that Ryder had picked up in Voeld. Peebee hadn’t had a chance to mess around with it. She was still really touched that Ryder had specifically gone out of her way to pick up the item. 

Most people when talking to Peebee, just tuned her out at some point but Ryder had listened. Not only listened, but _actually listened_. It meant a lot to her. If it hadn’t been for Ryder she might not be able to move onto the next part of her project. Ryder had given her space to pursue her dream even when Peebee had offered little information; for all Ryder knew she could be creating a bomb (not that she was). 

The next few days Peebee had solely dedicated to completing her project. She couldn’t wait to see Ryder’s reaction to all of this. 

—

Ryder was hella curious on two accounts: (1) she wanted to know what Peebee had been working on these past few days and (2) she was curious as to what Peebee’s apartment on the Nexus looked like. But then again, if Peebee hadn’t spent a lot of time in the past few months at the Nexus, maybe it would be just empty? Ryder stepped up to her door and knocked. She heard a crash on the other side and a string of curses. 

“You can come in!” Peebee yelled. The minute Ryder walked into her apartment Peebee jumped out of the way, waved her hands and yelled, “Ta-da! My project, she is complete.”

“She?” Ryder said without thinking. 

“Looks like a she to me,” Peebee snapped with a glowering look. Was that really all Ryder was going to say? “Just a proof of concept. I stripped out its Remnant command prompts to see if I could power it myself. It worked! Now I can build a field model with combat protocols that fights for you. So…uh…what do you think?” She looked over at her nervously. 

Ryder glowed at her, “You’ve really outdone yourself Peebee. I have no idea how you managed to get that working, but it’s incredible. I can’t wait to try it out on the field.” 

Footsteps echoed behind them and Peebee groaned at the sight of whoever was behind Ryder. “Shit, I forgot to lock the fucking door.” 

Kalinda stepped forward and winked at Peebee. “My, my, Pelassaria. Didn’t know you were still using this hole. Who’s your friend?”

Peebee shut down for a minute and started answering automatically, “Uh, Kalinda, this is Ryde—”

“Oh everyone knows the human Pathfinder. I meant, who’s your Remnant friend?”

“None of your fucking business,” Peebee spat back. Her anger was rearing its ugly head. 

“Of course it isn’t - that’s what makes it interesting. Don’t be so hostile, babe,” Kalinda retorted. 

Ryder stepped in between them before the situation became anymore heated. “Don’t be so condescending babe. She has every right to be hostile when there’s a trespasser in her home. I’ll walk you out,” Ryder interjected. 

When Ryder walked back into the room Peebee was sitting on the couch playing with the Remnant. Ryder supposed she was trying to keep her mind off of seeing…her ex? She still wasn’t 100% sure of their relationship status. Ryder sat beside Peebee. “Want to talk about it?”

“Oh. Well, Kalinda and I go way back. We uh, used to be together. We thought we could start a new and exciting life here and so we joined the Initiative. When we woke up, well actually when she woke up she pulled strings to get me out of cryo early. But she…just wasn’t the same. Or I wasn’t the same. I don’t know. But she was nasty and eventually I just had enough. I was tired of being treated poorly and so I snuck out to outposts, started carrying out my own missions. It was just another piece of evidence that showed me entanglements were silly. Just like places. So I’m done here. It’s time to pack up,” Peebee explained. 

Ryder listened patiently and her chest tightened at the thought of someone mistreating Peebee. “I’ll help you pack Peebee. Thanks for telling me. And just so you know, not everyone is like that you know? Our team isn’t like that.” She hesitated, Ryder wanted to say she wasn’t like that, but what would be the point in that? 

“I appreciate it Ryder, but I think I’ll pack on my own. I need some time alone.”  
—

Peebee had been in one serious relationship before. Just one. And that had been enough. The end of that relationship still felt really fresh despite it only being a year since she had separated from her partner. Ever since then she was determined to keep any future interactions with anyone light and fun and definitely noncommittal. So if any attraction or feelings came up, Peebee had come up with a sure way of dealing with them before any attachment occurred. She’d flirt with whoever, fuck sometimes, get it out of her system, and move on. Worked every time. To be fair, she also has really poor impulse control so that plan just happened naturally. 

And some nights, she just didn’t want to be alone. 

The ship buzzed quietly and Peebee tried to focus on that as she crawled into her bunk. She nestled in her sheets and closed her eyes. Today had been a whirlwind from her completing her pet project to running into fucking Kalinda again. Just the thought of her felt like a punch to the gut and a grimace formed on Peebee’s face. Even after a year she still couldn’t stand to look at her or be in the same room as her. 

Gratitude sprang into her chest as she thought of Ryder stepping in between them and telling Kalinda off. If it hadn’t been for Ryder that situation could have been a lot worse. If it hadn’t been for Ryder she wouldn’t have been able to finish her project! She couldn’t help grinning. She was so proud of what she had done. 

And really, if it hadn’t been for Ryder, she wouldn’t be here.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a short chapter but we're finally getting somewhere with these two dweebs. Enjoy!

The room was quiet. Ryder felt paralyzed with shock. It felt so surreal to be standing here over a Kett’s body with pity and sorrow. Exaltation…what an ugly, horrid thing. Jaal was hunched over the creature and Ryder didn’t know what to say. She looked over at Peebee somehow hoping she’d have the words. She looked just as lost. Peebee walked over and quietly said she would go on ahead to try and find the Moshae Sjefa. After she left the room, Ryder walked over and kneeled beside Jaal. 

“They are us,” Jaal softly said before he began to weep. 

“How many have I killed, not knowing? Ryder, I did not know.” 

Ryder tried to comfort Jaal, but she knew full well that if these had been her people, she would have been devastated. And these creatures might one day be of her people. So no words came to her that could provide any solace for such pain. Maybe the process could be reversed? Ryder didn’t say the thought out loud; she didn’t want to provide false hope. All Ryder could think to do was just be with Jaal so he wouldn't feel alone. 

Peebee wasn't gone for long when Ryder's comm turned on and Peebee frantically said, “I found the Moshae. Come to my location now.” Ryder and Jaal both felt unease at the prospect of leaving the Kett body. They would have to finish processing this at another time, they still had a mission to complete. 

Rage and misery fuelled them as they cut down the Kett to get to the Moshae. At the sight of her Jaal and Ryder both ran to help her off the ground. Ryder was so focused on making sure she was okay that she completely forgot to double check that the room was secure. The Cardinal was right in her face and she cursed herself for being so emotional in the field. She just wanted a win for the Angarans. 

“Not so fast,” Peebee chimed in, her gun pointed directly at the Cardinal’s head. She looked pissed off. No way in hell was anyone going to blow off Ryder’s head today, not on her fucking watch. With a snarl, the Cardinal lowered his arms. Ryder had never been so grateful to have this little spitfire Asari in her corner. 

“Arrogant simpletons. This is a gift! Who are you to deny it? These Chosen join with us to become great beyond your ability to understand,” the Cardinal spat out. Ryder did not have the patience for exactly fucking this. 

“Multiple Kett ships are inbound,” SAM announced. Of course they fucking are. Why wouldn’t they be? Ryder deserved nice things, like not Kett ships. Fuck her life. 

“There’s no time to open hundreds of pods, let alone help the Angara inside,” Peebee said while still holding the gun at the Cardinal’s head. 

“If you leave this sacred Temple intact I will give the command to release all of the Chosen,” the Cardinal offered. “Just leave this holy place standing.”

“No. This place must be destroyed,” the Moshae insisted as Jaal supported her. 

“But our scientists, our warriors, our families are inside. We can come back and destroy it another time,” Jaal argued. 

“They will simply fill this horror with Angarans after we have left,” the Moshae continued. 

Ryder was torn. She understood the arguments to both sides, they were both valid. If only there was time to do both. It was true, the Kett would most likely fill it up with Angarans again. It’s not as if the exaltation process was suddenly going to be stopped. But there were so many lives in here, so many lives that could help in tearing this place down in the future. And so many families missing these people. Ryder didn’t think she could make the call in destroying these families lives even further. She shook her head. They would try and make the effort to come back, they had to. 

“Fine. Do it,” Ryder said stiffly. 

The Cardinal immediately sent out the command, “Enact emergency shutdown. Release all the Chosen.” And almost immediately after, Ryder put a bullet in the Cardinal’s head.

—

Ryder was fucking exhausted. Today had been so much. When they got back to the ship Ryder immediately went to her room and collapsed on her bed. She needed the whole galaxy to stop and just play nice, just for one fucking day. Her eyes close for a second when there was a knock on her door. Ryder didn’t mean to, but she couldn’t help the groan that came out of her. What did the galaxy want _now_?

“Oh come off it Ryder. It’s just me,” Peebee muttered. Ryder grumbled. She didn’t have the energy to fight off the energized Asari tonight. “And I brought wine.” Oh the other hand, maybe she didn’t need to fight her off. Ryder slowly rolled off the bed and walked over to the door. When it opened, Peebee ran inside with two wine glasses and a bottle in her hand. 

“You know, I think I aged at least 20 years just waiting for you to get to the door,” Peebee teased as she jumped onto Ryder’s bed. She immediately popped the bottle open and filled the two glasses up. 

“Shut it short stuff,” Ryder replied. 

“Oh a short joke. That’s new!” Peebee started drinking her wine. “I don’t know about you but you need to have at least 2 bottles of wine.” 

“And yet you only brought one.” 

“I just assumed since you were the human Pathfinder you already had a vineyard named after you and at least several bottles in your suite.” 

“You’re adorable,” Ryder said dryly. 

“I know it,” Peebee gave her a wink. Ryder sighed. She did know it. 

Ryder sat down beside Peebee and grabbed a glass. After having a few sips, Ryder relaxed a little bit. Maybe she did need a fucking drink. “Thank you for bringing this, I definitely needed it.” 

“What can I sa— Oh I know what I can say! You should fire Lexi and hire me instead. I would take care of everyone so well,” Peebee said giggling a bit. 

“I did not peg you to be such a light weight,” Ryder said raising her eyebrow. 

“Bitch, please. I pre-drank before I got my sexy ass in here.”

“And so saucy.” 

Peebee rolled around on Ryder’s bed and looked out her window. “Man, look how gorgeous this galaxy is. Sometimes it’s hard to believe we’ve come so far,” Peebee said as Ryder topped off her glass and continued drinking. 

“We still have a fucking long ways to go,” Ryder sighed. Peebee scooted next to her and squeezed her hand gently before letting go. “But you have all of us to back you up. You know that right? Everyone saw what choice you made today for Jaal. That took guts. You’re kind of my hero now. Well, I guess Jaal’s more so, but I swear I’m not too far behind.” 

Ryder gave her a small smile. Peebee jumped out of bed and started searching around for a datapad, leaping from one side of the room to the other. “You have got to have an off button. How do you have so much energy after the day we had?” Peebee didn’t answer as she focused on her own personal mission. Ryder shrugged her shoulder, continued drinking and watched the show. Eventually Peebee came running back to her and bounced back onto the bed. 

“Here. I think we need to focus on something that isn’t today right? I have loaded up a classic human cult movie and we’re going to watch it and we’re going to finish this bottle. And whatever else you have laying around in this suite, ‘kay?” Peebee insisted. 

Ryder agreed. That actually sounded like a fantastic way to forget today even existed. And a good way to stop thinking about what consequences would come from her actions she had made today. Peebee propped up the datapad on the bed as the two of them laid down on their stomachs to watch whatever Peebee had picked out. It didn’t really matter. Halfway through the movie they had opened up another bottle and the booze was really making Ryder’s head spin. The warmth of the booze travelled throughout Ryder’s entire body as it relaxed her and made her even more drowsy. At one point in the film Ryder started nodding off because one moment there was some bomb exploding on screen and the next her room was completely dark. Peebee had taken away the datapad and laid Ryder on her back. As Peebee was bringing the comforter over Ryder she noticed her eyes were opened. “You know you snore pretty badly right?” Peebee laughed softly. 

Her head was still spinning as Ryder pushed herself to sit up for a moment. “Thanks for um, movie and uh things.” The warmth flooded Ryder’s chest and she leaned in giving Peebee a kiss. “You’re as eloquent as your snoring. C’mon drunk, let’s put you to bed,” Peebee said as she gently pushed Ryder back. Ryder fell asleep almost instantly.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another quick chapter! I swear the chapters will be more hefty coming up. I just was inspired to write the later scenes so now it's a matter of filling in the gaps! But, enjoy. :)

An obnoxious alarm rang out in Ryder’s head and she quickly sat up clutching her head. “I’m up, I’m up SAM.” The alarm stopped and Ryder sighed with relief. “Why was it so loud SAM?” Ryder demanded. 

“You clearly stated that you needed to be up precisely at this time so that you had enough time to be ready for when we arrived on Aya,” SAM curtly responded. 

“I…right. Thank you SAM,” Ryder said. Right, she completely forgot. They had all been given invitation to come aboard, and not just Ryder, her whole team. This was a big step in their relationship with the Angara. Best to not fuck it up. Her head pounded slightly and she rubbed her temples. Alright, Ryder swung her feet from the bed onto the floor and she stood up. As she was putting on her pants she noticed the wine glasses on the side table and last night came rushing back all at once. She started blushing as she remembered the goodnight kiss she had given Peebee. Well, Peebee wasn’t in her bed and there were no outstanding messages from her so maybe if she just pretended she didn’t remember they wouldn’t talk about it. It was just a stupid drunken kiss and it didn’t mean anything. She really didn’t want to mess with their dynamic. Ryder pushed it out of her mind and continued to get dressed. 

As they were nearing the landing zone, Ryder stepped out of her room and joined up with the rest of the team. “Okay, everyone on their best behaviour. Keep your hands to yourself. Don’t touch anything. And if anyone needs help, let me know so we can do what we can for them okay?” Ryder quickly went over. 

“…we’re not children Ryder,” Vetra said slowly. 

“Well, _someone_ has been leaving crumbs and not cleaning up after themselves so I’m not really sure anymore,” Ryder replied. 

“I already told you Ryder that there’s some animal on the ship,” Drack said. 

“Quit blaming the imaginary animal. We’re done talking about it. Okay, go have fun, explore. I’ll see you guys in the evening.” 

—

Peebee bolted from the ship and immediately started chatting up Angarans trying to figure out if anyone knew anything about the Remnant. Most Angarans didn’t want to talk with Peebee, which didn’t surprise her, but what surprised her was the lack of interest in the Remnant almost everyone had. They knew of them, but really didn’t care. Most of them just suggested that if she wanted any additional information on them she would check out their museum. That didn’t really sit well with Peebee. It’s just, the whole purpose of museums is to display objects that have cultural and educational relevance. Typically if something ended up in a museum, there wasn’t really much more to discover about whatever it might be. So if…someone had already figured out the Remnant…what was the point of her? 

She squashed the thought and decided to check out the museum incase their understanding of museums was different from the Milky Way. Peebee located the museum without much trouble and started exploring. She quickly realized she was going to need a drink if she was going to finish exploring this museum. One last thought stuck with her and felt haunting.

Maybe Andromeda was a mistake.

—

After Ryder finished checking in with the higher ups she had finally the time to catch up with the others and properly see Aya. One of the Angarans suggested she pay a visit to the museum so she could see a bit more of their culture and history. Before catching up with everyone, Ryder decided to visit the museum since she was probably going to be the only one to check it out, well maybe except for Suvi. 

As she stepped in she was surprised to see Peebee…staring at the Remnant relics, of course. Now she wasn’t terribly surprised. She waved at Peebee as she walked towards her. 

“Getting acquainted with our new neighbours?” Ryder asked. 

Peebee was swaying a bit and slurred, “Sort of. All this…stuff. The Angara sure do have a rich culture and blah blah blah.” She didn’t mean to sound bitter, but she was bitter. 

Ryder raised her eyebrow, “You’re sauced aren’t you? What’s your poison?”

“Yeahhhhhhh… I visited that cafe the Angara consider a bar. Asked for their hardest stuff. It was weird, which I like, but had almost no punch! Lightweig— whoa,” Peebee said surprised as her head started spinning. She was having a hard time standing straight. It’d be a lot easier if the ground would stop shifting. 

“Hey…steady now,” Ryder said as she reached over to help support Peebee. 

“That stuff must have a slow absorption rate. Whoops,” Peebee chuckled for a bit before looking somber. Before she could shut off her facial expression she saw Ryder looking at her concerned. She knew she was going to say something so she beat Ryder to the punch. 

“Ryder it’s just…this museum reminds me of being on Hyetiana during my indentured services as a student. They even have a whole section here on the Remnant. _A whole section._ I didn’t come to Andromeda to follow in someone else’s footsteps.”

Ryder’s heart broke for Peebee. “Hey…don’t worry Peebee. The Angara barely have a foothold. Sure, they live among the ruins. But they haven’t seen what we’ve already seen.” She tried showing Peebee that she was still doing something no one else ever had. Peebee thought about it for a moment; she was wracking her brain through the information that was presented in this world and what she had discovered. There was a discrepancy. 

“I guess you have a point there…bet nobody here has ever outrun an ancient vault purification field, huh?” Peebee asked excitedly. Her enthusiasm was back. 

Ryder smiled softy, “Nope. Definitely not.”

“Or spat in that Archon’s ugly mug and lived to talk about it! That was, nice work by the way.”

“Thank you.”

Peebee sighed. “Not sure why but ever since I packed up my apartment on the Nexus, something’s crawled under my skin. But whatever it is, I promise to get over it lickety-split.” 

“You’re fine, Peebee. We all need to cut loose once in awhile,” Ryder said as she reached over and gave Peebee’s hand a gentle squeeze.

“You’re verrryyyyy understanding. And attractive. Nice combination. Think I’ll stick around in your operation a little longer,” Peebee said genuinely. “But I gotta tell ya Ryder, you need to work on your kissing,” Peebee mumbled as she staggered out of the room. 

Ryder stood there and definitely did not turn red. Everyone who said otherwise was a _liar._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter I had planned out to end in ... well a different way. But this felt more natural. So there you go!

After getting back to the Tempest, Peebee felt inspired to started creating something else. Something that no one else had created and figured out. Ryder had inspired her at the museum. Instead of being bogged down with the discovery that someone else had investigated the Remnant before her, Peebee was going to use that. She was going to use that information to create and discover something different than what the Angara had uncovered and worked on. And it’s not like she had competition from the Angara, not really. Everyone seemed to be a lot more focused on the Kett and well, the new “aliens.” So she was going to create something that would benefit the team. Maybe something that would help them find Meridian. 

Peebee sighed with frustration as she slumped over at her desk. But what could her next project be? Aya had proven to them that there was a central command centre for all these vaults. Everything they’ve uncovered so far was somehow connected to everything. All those Remnant machines they had fought and all the vaults they had unlocked, all connected. But they couldn’t find Meridian because they didn’t have a signature from the machines on Meridian. Her scanners so far could only pick up and find signatures they were already familiar with. If they couldn’t get the map to Meridian how would they find the pla—

An idea sparked in her brain and Peebee immediately got to work.   
—

It had been several days since anyone had really seen Peebee. Ryder was starting to get worried that maybe Peebee had spiralled back to what she had been thinking on Aya. She had sent a few messages but had received no replies. Ryder wanted to give her space incase she needed the time alone but she was legitimately becoming concerned. She headed towards the escape pod and opened it up. Ryder felt relief relax her body as she saw Peebee standing over several pieces of Rem-Tech, tapping her foot with a frustrated expression. 

Ryder went up to her, gently tapping her on the shoulder. Peebee jumped at least two feet into the air. 

“Jesus Ryder, you don’t sneak up on people like that,” Peebee says out of breath clutching her chest. 

Everything was starting to overwhelm Peebee and corner her and making her feel like she was suffocating and that she was being trapped and that she was attracted to Ryder and that she needed to run away and that she needed to talk and find some way to relax. There were a lot of and’s running through her head. The last person she needed to see right now was Ryder. Peebee sighed, but then again Ryder just had a very relaxing effect on Peebee that she couldn’t quite understand. 

“You seem…stressed,” Ryder stated. She hadn’t seen Peebee so agitated before. 

“No shit. I’m just, I’m not built for this kind of….homesteading. Don’t like people knowing where I am, where my stuff is…argh!” Peebee burst out with. She started pacing back and forth in the small pod. 

“Okay, you have got to relax. You’re starting to stress _me_ out and I’ve only been here for two minutes,” Ryder said while trying to think of what could help Peebee actually relax. 

Peebee let out another frustrated sigh. “I’d like to. I need to…yes. When I felt like this back home, I’d look for a zero G chamber or at least an isolation tank. Someplace to just drift away. I could really use that now.” 

Ryder started trying to think of where they could possibly find an isolation tank when SAM interrupted her thoughts. “If I may, gravity can be overridden in the escape pod. You can create a zero-G chamber.” 

“Of course! SAM, you’re a genius!” Peebee said excitedly. If she could hug the AI, she would have. “Okay, let’s do this. It’ll make a huge different Ryder. You’ll see!” Peebee quickly ran over to the control panel in the pod and started making the adjustments. She stepped into the pod and looked over at Ryder. “You know…there’s room for two,” Peebee said slyly. 

Ryder told herself that she only thought this was a good idea because she was curious to what the zero G chamber would feel like. It had been so long since she had been in one. At least, that’s what she told herself. “That’s all I needed to hear,” Ryder said as she stepped into the pod. There really was very little space for the two of them. 

Peebee finished with the controls. “And this should….do it.” Gravity disappeared and the two of them started floating. Peebee took a deep breath and closed her eyes. She hadn’t felt this light for so long. This was exactly what she had needed. “Ah…this hits the spot. Just close your eyes….and let go.”

Her mind finally stopped running a hundred thoughts per second and she was able to focus on what was upsetting her. It could have been a million different things, but if Peebee had to pick only one…it must be the move that’s upset her. This move from her apartment on the Nexus to the Tempest was really getting to her. Running into Kalinda didn’t really give it the best start. It just gave her a reminder of what happens when you agree to strings with someone. After all, so many years ago she would died for Kalinda. She just, never had expected to be hurt so cruelly by someone who said they loved her. Not that Ryder needed to know the details. Or any of it really. 

Maybe she could somehow convince Ryder to sleep with her so she could work through her attraction, let it go, and move on before any attachment started creeping it’s claws into her. The last thing she wanted was another failed relationship. Just getting rid of this gnawing concern would relax Peebee even further. 

And if Ryder isn’t game, then that’s fine. She’d find someone else to mess around with. That really wasn’t her worry. 

Peebee opened her eyes and looked over at Ryder with an alluring look. “Hey Ryder? There’s…something else that would relax me.” 

Ryder looked over. “Yeah?”

A soft chuckle came from Peebee as she floated closer to Ryder. “That’s the spirit. Want to…fool around? Doesn’t matter if you have something else going on. I can be utterly discreet. Just fun. Two people, blowing off steam. No strings attached. But only if there are no strings.” She wanted to be clear. She didn’t want a relationship with Ryder, not to mention she was sure Ryder wouldn’t be interested in that anyway. But Peebee really didn’t think there was any harm in sleeping with her. 

Ryder’s heart sunk at the mention of strings. This wasn’t new information. This was completely expected. So why was she upset then? She wasn’t in love with Peebee. Sure she had a crush. But who wouldn’t? Peebee…just brought joy to her life. She was funny. Charming. Gorgeous. Well, it didn’t matter. It couldn’t matter. She couldn’t let it. She’d have to get over herself eventually. 

“That’ll be fun,” Ryder said thoughtfully. Sure. If this was going to be her only chance with Peebee, Ryder was going to enjoy it and move on. Or try at least.

“Okay then. Say no more,” Peebee said excitedly. She pulled Ryder in and brushed away her hair. 

“Oh you mean now? Here?” Ryder asked suddenly. 

“You do know what ‘say no more’ means right?” Peebee teased. She brought Ryder in closer and kissed her. Her eyes closed as she deepened the kiss. Her heart was racing.

“Oh, we’re floating right into—” Peebee was interrupted as they crashed into the ceiling. Both their heads throbbed but they couldn’t stop laughing. “Okay, maybe here isn’t the best place,” Peebee said while rubbing her head. 

So instead, they just floated around and laughed.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally a more hefty chapter! I also wanted to say it's been a blast writing this and a delight to get such positive reactions to this story. Thank you. <3

Kadara always looked so deceptive to Ryder. At first glance, it looked gorgeous; the clear skies, the luscious vegetation, the sparkling blue lakes. Underneath that facade was the stark reality of the planet — a dangerous habitat, teeming with convicts, acidic water, and alien creatures. Until they sorted business out with Sloane and the Collective, Ryder was sure the planet would just continue to make her feel uneasy. 

Fortunately Kadara was the last stop in picking up an important piece of Rem-Tech for Peebee. This morning Peebee was explaining to Jaal exactly what she was putting together. 

“Okay so currently we can only scan for Remnant signatures we’ve already encountered. Which is great, but limited range. My scanner’s already doing that around the clock. But if I integrate the right Rem-Tech, we could scour the cluster for literally any Remnant signature. Even ones we don’t have! My scanner would literally become a Remnant mystery detector,” Peebee chattered proudly. She was so close and so excited. She was going to have the ability to find the never-before-found. 

“I see. How do you know that this will work?” Jaal asked curiously. 

“When I try it out,” Peebee stared at him. “Plus I’m brilliant. You know this already Jaal, c’mon man.” 

The three of them headed into the Nomad and drove around until they reached the site where the last piece of tech should have been located. The place was deserted and stripped clean. Each of them walked around and investigated the grounds but someone clearly had gotten to the piece first. But who had the intel of it’s location? Fortunately after awhile Peebee received a message from Krannit informing her that he had the last piece but was willing to trade it for credits. 

“Okay Ryder it could be a trap, 100% it’s a trap, but that’s why you’re coming with me.”

“I am?”

“Yes for moral and physical support of course.” 

Ryder sighed but ultimately agreed. The two of them prepared the best they could for the meeting since weapons were not allowed in the Port. They left the Tempest and walked over to the spot that Krannit had specified. They scanned the area before approaching but found it…clean. That didn’t make sense. Peebee shrugged and went over to the railing, looking at people milling around. The sun was beginning to set and the sky was an intense mixture of pinks and oranges. It was almost breathtaking. Almost. The colours washed over Peebee and gave her a glow that definitely took Ryder’s breath away. Ryder hurriedly looked away incase Peebee caught her expression. 

Ryder shook it off and walked right up beside Peebee. “Despite what a strange place we’re at… I’m glad we still get to watch the sun set. It’s beautiful.” Peebee looked over into Ryder’s eyes and the world fell quiet. “It really is beautiful,” Peebee replied. Ryder briefly forgot why they were here and wanted to talk about Peebee strings. Or potential strings. The moment felt right. 

“I —” Ryder started but was interrupted. 

“Ryder come in. We have a problem,” Kallo said with a slight panic to his voice. The moment was gone.

“Go ahead Kallo.”

“We’ve had an intruder. Got onboard and into Peebee’s quarters. Her bot is gone.” _What._

“POC?” Peebee asked quietly. This wasn’t happening. She had worked so hard on POC. Who had the fucking gall. Peebee was starting to rage. 

“They left an impressive piece of Rem-Tech and a recorded message. Relaying it now,” Kallo continued.

This better be fucking good. Someone had dared to sneak on her ship and steal from her crew. “Ryder. It’s Kalinda T’reve. Pelessaria’s…well, whatever she calls me these days. Please tell her thank you for the nifty bot. I trust the Rem-Tech piece my crew left will be adequate payment. Oh, and no need to wait for my Krogan friend Krannit — he and his outlaws work for me. Ta!”

“Shit. Why can’t she just leave me alone?” Peebee wanted to punch the wall, a Kett, _anything_. 

“Why does she have it in for you Peebee? What’s her deal?” Ryder asked. This felt really personal. 

“She shouldn’t. I’m the offended party. She…” Peebee look away for a moment while she debated telling the truth to Ryder. “Okay. So back home she was upper crust: an ambassador, respected, living the high life. But miserable. Not built for royalty, she said. With her position, the initiative sought her out as a first contact specialist. First wave out of stasis. I was just a low level technician so I would still be in cryo right now. Kalinda was the one who got me thawed out early. I’m still grateful for that. But things went south soon. She hurt me…pretty badly. You never expect it from someone you love. Well, had loved.” 

Ryder gives her a gentle smile and didn’t want to press on. “I’m sorry Peebee. She—”

Peebee didn’t want to get into this anymore so she just jumped in, “Anyway, to complete my scanner, I need access to the storage device in POC. I’m sorry you’re catching her crap now Ryder. You don’t have to deal with this — I’ll take care of this on my own. I promise.”

Ryder was a bit thrown off by Peebee’s interruption. If Peebee wanted to talk about it, she supposed she would. “Hey, we’re in this together.”  
“Uh…thanks. When I have a lead on getting POC back I’ll let you know,” Peebee was genuinely surprised. Ryder hadn’t tried to interrogate her further and didn’t even say anything to her interrupting. “I can’t believe that bitch stole my bot.” 

—

Soon after Peebee left Ryder by herself to process what was running through her head. She felt so shaken by the intrusion. _This_ was why Peebee had been on the move for the past year. If she was constantly changing her location then no one would have the faintest idea of where she was or where her shit was. She felt so exposed with her sense of security stripped away. 

And now, after she had actually began to feel safe again, something so important was stolen. On top of all of that, she now had to deal with Kalinda. Again. Peebee really hoped that after the apartment incident, they wouldn’t run into each other again. Well, at least for a few hundred years. But, she supposed, this is what happens when she starts thinking optimistically. 

Peebee knew she could start tracking down members of Kalinda’s crew right now…but she just didn’t have it in her. Not tonight at least. She needed to … just collect herself. And have a fucking drink.

—

Peebee woke up gasping for breath in the middle of the night. She tried to calm her breathing. Her mind was reeling from the nightmare she just had. It had somehow managed to take every little fear she had and crammed them all into one toxic dream. Her skin felt like it was crawling and that there were a million eyes watching her. Peebee told herself that it was untrue but she couldn’t shake it off and panic just set further into her chest. Everything was so dark and quiet on the ship and Peebee couldn’t handle it. She sprang out of bed and ran down the hallway to Ryder’s door. As she approached the door she stopped herself and stared at it. Before knocking she looked at her watch and saw that it was fucking 3:28 am. 

Should she wake Ryder up? Who else could she wake up and talk to? She didn’t really want to talk to anyone else. Drack would murder her if she woke him up right now. He claims he needs at least 10 hours of beauty rest. She didn’t know what Jaal was like if you woke him up, so maybe tonight wasn’t the night to find out. And…she wasn’t actually sure if Vetra actually liked her. 

Hesitantly she knocked on the door and bit her lip. She heard a groan from the other side of the door and foot steps walking towards her. Quick. If Peebee left right now and hid behind the corner, Ryder would never know it was her but… she couldn’t move right now. She was frozen and fidgety and couldn’t calm down. 

The door opened and Ryder was rubbing her eyes. “Hmm?”

Peebee awkwardly gripped her left elbow with her other hand and looked at the floor. “Um. Sorry for waking you. I was just— See I’m still trying to. No that’s not it. I’m really actually supposed to—“ 

“Hey, are you okay?”

The question stopped Peebee as she looked up at Ryder. “No.” Ryder immediately hugged Peebee and pat her back. “Don’t worry. We’re going to get POC back. She’s not going to come back onto this ship unless she wants to get airlocked okay?” 

The moment when Ryder embraced Peebee, she let go. And Ryder didn't say anything after that. She just held her until Peebee’s breaths returned to a normal pattern and she had stopped shaking. Ryder didn't know what to say. She understood how upsetting it would be if someone tampered with something she had worked on. She remembered too vividly how terrifying it had been when someone had tampered with SAM. 

Ryder grabbed her blue hand and brought her into the room. “Here, sit down. I’ll get you something to drink.” Peebee listened and sat on the edge of the bed. What was she doing? Why wasn’t Ryder upset or even remotely annoyed with her knocking at such a late time? Was this a mistake? When was she going to be able to shake off that horrifying nightmare that kept replaying in her head? 

The moment Ryder left, her brain refused to settle down but instead started spitting out a hundred questions a minute and trying to figure them out. A blink and suddenly there was a hot steaming cup of something in her hands. 

“It’s chamomile tea with a touch of honey. I had it all the time back in the Milky Way whenever I had a bad night. And I had plenty of bad nights. I only pull it out on really bad nights lately,” Ryder explained. 

“Chamomile?” 

“Yeah, it’s a type of plant from Earth. Just helps me to calm down. Try it.” 

Peebee blew softly at the hot liquid and took a sip. A sigh left her lips and she took another sip. It really was soothing. Or maybe she just really needed a hot drink. There was a quiet that settled between the two. Peebee didn't know what to say, she just felt really torn. She wanted to be here and open up and talk about what was really upsetting her but that would make her feel way too vulnerable. And she had been feeling plenty vulnerable lately. At the same time, she hated that she’s here and felt she’s already said too much. Stupid attachments. She didn't need them. She didn’t need Ryder. 

Guilt rushed into her chest at the thought and she tried instead to focus on the tea. Ryder wouldn’t understand. She’s just said what she said before because she knows it’s what she wanted to hear. She didn't mean it. POC is lost. They weren’t going to waste their time trying to retrieve her bot when they could be hunting down the Archon.

Ryder cleared her throat. “I…know it’s not the same but, that feeling of violation is terrifying. I get that. Just last week someone tried to severe my connection with SAM and—“ 

Peebee immediately interrupted, “Wait. I’m sorry what? You didn’t say anything or—“

“No I didn’t. I wasn’t ready or comfortable talking about it because it felt like I was exposing my vulnerabilities. I’m just trying to say that you don’t have to say anything. If you need to have just someone here, then I can do that for you. And if you don’t want me to say anything to anyone, I don’t need to. This isn’t about me. This is about you,” Ryder finished. 

Silence fell comfortably between the two. Peebee sipped her tea and felt more at ease. 

“Thank you.” And it’s the last thing Peebee said that night before falling asleep in Ryder’s bed. As Ryder tucked Peebee into bed, she took the cup and left it on the side table. She sat down and run her hand through her hair. She had never seen Peebee so shaken. Her heart felt like it had been strung up; she could barely breathe. If fucking Kalinda ever showed her face again, she wold personally run her over with the Nomad. 

The sun was slowly starting to peek through the blinds. Ryder sighed and crawled back into bed quickly falling asleep. Tomorrow they both would need their strength.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Focused on Ryder's and Scott's relationship in here a bit. Hope you enjoy!

When Ryder woke in the morning she didn’t disturb Peebee and let her sleep. She got up and sat at her desk to go through her messages. At one moment Ryder didn’t even realize she had started to hold her breath as she read through her most recent message concerning her brother. He wasn’t awake but there was an update. Yeah, it’d be a good thing to visit. She hadn’t made much effort lately because…it just, would have felt too real. It was simpler to go about with the delusion that your brother just hasn’t been thawed out of cryo. Guilt made her throat close up and she just ended up staring at the message for a moment. She had just been compartmentalizing her life in a way where she allowed herself only to be focused on the most immediate threat. After all, she had to focus on finding outposts and fighting off Kett and somehow gluing the Initiative back together in some coherent way. 

Everything else…was just put in a separate box that she would deal with if it became a pressing issue or if she had time. And lately there hadn’t been a lot of time. 

Ryder pulled up a blank message and started typing to the crew. They would have another day off so she could have time to check in on her brother. Ryder quickly sent a vague email deciding not to divulge she was going to see him. She was barely prepared to visit Scott, let alone talk to the whole team about it. 

And the guilt she was feeling was really due to the fact that until now she hadn't made the time to go visit Scott. Not that he would have blamed her if he knew what was going on. Ryder sighed and shook her head. Near her desk was another framed photo laying face down. She picked it up briefly and looked at the photo of her and Scott. The photo was taken on the day they both had decided to join the initiative together. They were going to explore a whole galaxy together. But ever since that first day in Andromeda, just the sight of the photo shook Ryder too much. As the Human Pathfinder she was trying desperately to make it look like she had it together and that meant not thinking about that day. Ryder guessed today was the day when she wasn't going to be okay. Some drops fell on the glass of the photo and Ryder rubbed her eyes, surprised to find she was crying.

"Whatcha lookin' at?" Peebee inquired from bed. 

"Oh, um," Ryder quickly wiped her eyes, "Just a photo of my brother." 

Peebee bounced off the bed and stood right next to Ryder. "Huh, you hardly ever talk about your brother." She looked intently at the photo. "You guys have the same smile." 

Ryder's heart tightened. Her mother used to say the same thing. "Yeah, everything has just been…busy. Anyway it’s fine,” Ryder said while looking away.

"Bullshit." 

"I'm sorry, what?" 

"I call bullshit. Have you never played bullshit?" Peebee inquired with a confused look. 

“No I have. I’m just not sure what you’re calling bullshit on. I have been busy,” Ryder replied. 

“Oh I know. But that’s not the reason you don’t talk about him,” Peebee looked at her trying to crack the code. 

“Sorry, I’d chat Peebee but I have a meeting with Addison and Tann,” Ryder lied and then quickly headed towards her closet. 

“Fine, but when you get back we’re having tea and talking about what’s up,” Peebee demanded. 

“We’ll see okay?” Ryder didn’t have the energy right now to fight her off. She slipped into her casual white top and cargo pants. 

When Ryder stepped back into the room, Peebee was already gone. 

—

The stark white walls left Ryder feeling exposed as she walked towards Scott in the Med Bay. She smiled at the sight of him being out of his stasis pod. She came up and took his hand, giving him a gentle squeeze. She really missed him. 

“How is he Dr. Carlyle?” Ryder asked. 

“Well, we got him out of the pod. I don’t want to get your hopes up but SAM managed to, well, “find” him, you might say,” Dr. Carlyle said. 

“I don’t follow,” Ryder was trying to figure out what that could possibly entail.

“Well he’s still in a coma. But he also has an implant like yours. And SAM managed to access it. He’s made contact,” he continued.

Her breath caught in her throat. “That’s…incredible — he’s okay?”

“Vitals are steady, but I’m letting SAM take the lead on this one.”

“Though in a coma, Scott’s mental processes remain intact,” SAM informed Ryder.

“So is he okay?” That’s all Ryder wanted to know. She would take a fucking simple yes or no at this point. 

“You can ask him yourself. A moment while I establish a link with his implant,” SAM said. 

She…would be able to talk to him? After so many weeks she would finally hear his voice again?   
“Scott…? Can you hear me?” Ryder asked hesitantly. 

“Is that you Sara? I don’t understand. What’s happening?” His voice echoed in her head and she couldn’t help smiling. 

“There was a problem with your stasis pod. You’re in a coma on the Hyperion. Do you understand?” Ryder gently informed him. “SAM linked into your implant. But they say you’re stable. You’re safe and sound in the med bay.”

“Guess I’ll take your word for it. I can’t feel anything but I still hear you. Is Dad okay?” Scott wondered.

Ryder’s smile immediately vanished. Right. That. She wanted to tell him the truth so badly, but what if he went into shock? Would it worsen his condition somehow?   
“He’s…away on a mission right now. I know he’s worried about you though,” Ryder lied. She hoped he’d forgive her if — _when_ he woke up. 

“Yeah, sure he is. I’m probably just lost baggage to him by now.” Ryder could almost see his eyeroll.

“You’re wrong. He cares,” She tried to assure him.

“Well at least he’s barking orders at you and not me,” he chuckled softly.

“Yeah,” That’s all she could say. She was slowly feeling more and more shitty for letting Scott believe this. Maybe she should back track and just fess up. 

“So how’s our new home? Does habitat 7 live up to the hype?” Scott asked. 

Fuck. Of course Scott would want to know. Not how he was doing or what she had been up to. Ryder looked at Scott’s face and wish he would just open his eyes so he could see for himself. Maybe if she hyped it up his brain would be more willing to wake Scott up.

“Just wait till you see it. It’s amazing. Even better than the hype,” Ryder said softly. 

“That’s great news!”

“We’re busy getting colonies up and running” Which wasn’t a complete lie. 

“And if I could move any part of my body, I’d be there helping you guys.”

“You were never one to quit little brother. A nap won’t hold you back,” she squeezed his hand again, somehow hoping he’d feel it. 

“Oh I don’t know. I could get used to this. A nice IV drip…nurses to keep my company.” This little shit.

“Slacker.”

“Yeah, what—” Scott’s voice was cut off and Ryder stood up in alarm. “What Scott? What’s happened? Is he okay?” 

“The connection was only temporary. His condition remains stable,” SAM assured Ryder. 

“Sorry. Seemed better than nothing. I’ll keep you posted. Promise,” Dr. Carlyle said. Ryder nodded and stared at Scott. The world felt empty again. A gap in Ryder’s heart ached and she couldn’t simply ignore it in that moment. He was going to come back right? She didn’t ask SAM or the doctor. She didn’t want to be told there was the possibility he would never wake.   
—

Ryder wasn’t ready to go back on the Tempest. That was half the reason why she was sitting in the corner at the Vortex going through her third drink. She was trying to drown her emotions. She wasn’t okay. 

A drink appeared in front of Ryder and a familiar blue Asari sat across from her. 

“Hey.” Her voice was so gentle among the chatter of the bar. 

Peebee looked over at Ryder and never quite realized how tired she looked. She had followed Ryder briefly after she had left the Tempest because something wasn’t quite sitting well in her gut. When she saw Ryder walk into the Med Bay she knew she had gone to see her brother and had waited until her visit was done. The face Ryder had when she had left the Med Bay broke Peebee’s heart. She was worried what the doctor might have said about Scott. 

“Are you okay?” 

Ryder let out a weak laugh. “Definitely not.” 

“What’s wrong?” Peebee took Ryder’s hand and gave it a soft squeeze.

Her eyes watered at the reminder of holding her brother’s hand. “Scott’s still in a coma. I don’t know when he’s waking up. What if he doesn’t wake up?” 

“What did the doctor say?” 

“Just that his condition was stable. And I managed to talk to Scot—” Peebee immediately interrupted Ryder. 

“I’m sorry _what_. You talked to Scott? How was that possible? What did he say? Wha— Sorry. One question at a time. I didn’t mean to,” Peebee reeled herself back in, feeling a bit sheepish. 

Ryder laughed lightly at her and then her expression turned a bit grim, “No it’s fine. Um, since Scott has the implant in his head I was able to talk to him through SAM. I was just a really shitty sister and lied to him about our dad being alive and the golden worlds being golden.” 

“Well, I mean I don’t blame you. You didn’t want to upset him,” Peebee casually shrugged. 

“No I didn’t. But if — when he wakes up, he’s going to be pissed off at me. Especially because I lied about some pretty big things. He could be pissed in the 'I'm ignoring you for a week' kind of pissed or maybe never forgive you kind of pissed,” Ryder muttered. She stared at the drink in front of her. She quickly downed it and stood up. “I’m going back now.” 

When Ryder stood, the ground somehow shifter underneath her and she stumbled. She would have fallen and smashed something if Peebee hadn’t caught her. “Here, I’ll carry you home, drunk.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy!

During their flight to Elaaden, Ryder kept to herself and to her room. She couldn’t stop thinking about her brother and, consequently, her dad. So Ryder bounced between refreshing her messages and sleeping which she could conveniently do both at her bed. It wasn’t until about 7:00 pm there was a knocking on her door. It was the first time that day that anyone had actually bothered Ryder for anything, which honestly was strange but she didn’t think much of it. When Ryder opened up the door Lexi was standing at the door and Ryder did everything she could to suppress a groan. She didn’t want to be evaluated or poked with a needle today. 

“I need to do an evaluation with you Ryder,” Lexi informed her. 

“But I need to prepare for the miss—”

“Nope. That’s what you said last time. Sorry you’re coming with me,” Lexi said with slight irritation. She wasn’t going to be played again. 

Ryder sighed and followed Lexi. “Fine, let’s get it over and done with.” 

Ryder followed Lexi, not really paying attention to where they were going to do the evaluation when suddenly she was shoved into a dark room. _The fuck now._ Suddenly fairy lights turned on which were hanging from the ceiling. Sheets were draped over furniture and pillows littered the floor. It looked like a gigantic pillow fort. 

And everyone was here. 

As touching as this all was, Ryder still was hella confused as to what was exactly going on. Suddenly there was a blur of blue and Ryder felt herself being tackled. A familiar blue Asari was looking down and winked at her. “Hey hot stuff.” 

“If I had known it was going to be _that_ kind of celebration I would have excused myself from the planning committee,” Jaal muttered and started taking off his top. 

“Jaal keep your shirt on. You can show off to Liam another time,” Peebee said with slight annoyance. 

“It was a jest.”

Vetra shoved Peebee off and helped Ryder up. “What these idiots are trying to say is that you’ve been stressed. And the past few days you seem to be in particular rough shape and so we thought we could all have a good night of no stresses. Just the team, drinks, and some classic games. What do ya say?” 

“But what about the missio—” 

Cora stepped in, “The mission on Elaaden can wait. The heated scorching planet is going to be the exact same if you just wait a day. So, relax. That’s an order.” 

“Well when you put it that way how can I say no?” Ryder said rolling her eyes. 

“Shut up and put on your stupid pjs,” Cora smirked and elbowed Ryder lightly. 

“ _Ow._ Lexi, Cora’s elbowing in my chest. My heart’s still fragile,” Ryder whined. 

Lexi looked at her skeptically. “If you had bothered to show up to _any_ of your scheduled evaluations then maybe I would agree with you but you seem fine, so I’ll allow it.” 

“You all suck.”

“But I brought booze,” Liam added.

“Fine. You all suck except Liam.”

“ _Thank you_.” Liam curtsied. 

—

They had a wild night. The night started innocent enough with a predictable-badly-acted rom-com to get everyone laughing and distracted. To taking shots while playing darts. To playing poker to terrible drunk dancing to story telling of hilarious adventures. It was the first time they all had cut loose together and forgot about the galaxy outside their walls. It replenished Ryder and she felt such gratitude being stuck with this odd group of individuals. Nearly everyone had fallen asleep late into the night except Ryder and Peebee. They both stared at the stars. Ryder was enjoying the quiet while Peebee was slowly getting antsy from the lack of noise stimulation. She scooted closer to Ryder who was laying down, staring out the window, and buried under layers of blankets. 

“Feeling better?” Peebee asked gently. 

Ryder smiled at her, “Yeah, actually I feel refreshed. I…needed this.” 

Peebee grinned wildly. “So my plan worked!” 

“This was all you?”

“Well, no. I mean not _all_ of it was me, but I got everyone into it!” 

Ryder felt at ease and content to know he had the support of all of these weirdos. “Appreciate it. Means a lot.”

“You know you can lean on all of us right? We’re family too,” Peebee added. “And uh, thanks for everything before. It’s nice having someone who appreciates me for me instead of telling me I’m getting on your last nerve. I’m lucky I met you.”

Ryder’s voice got stuck, so all she could say was, “Yeah.” 

—

The wind blasted sand across Ryder’s face as she took off her helmet to help Peebee search for POC in this abandoned shelter. As they walked around the “cool” place a Turian stood in the corner, pretending to be …invisible? 

“Hey there stranger. We’re just going to grab something that belongs to us and then we’ll be out of your place, ‘kay?” Ryder asked. 

“This is all mine. I-I can sell it for a price though!” The Turian blurted out nervously.

Ryder sighed. One time, just one time it would be nice to run into someone who was just ‘sure of course, here you go, have a good day! Sorry for bothering you.’ Just once. 

They paid the guy and Peebee rushed over to POC. She started lifting her limbs and poking around to see if she was going to react in any way. “What did she do to you POC?” 

“She’s…not moving,” said Ryder not sure what to do. 

“Yeah. Kalinda did a number on POC. Just checking that all her parts are here and then we should be good to go,” Peebee concentrated on going through POC and grabbed a few screws off the floor. She went through one last sweep before deciding she had everything she needed to put POC back together. Before picking POC up, Peebee hugged Ryder quickly. 

“Thank you for helping me find POC.”

—

After a few hours, Ryder decided to go see Peebee and check in with her on how POC was. She stepped into the escape pod to find Peebee standing still with a … well, expression that she often saw on Lexi’s face. Unamused. 

“Hi,” Peebee said with no energy whatsoever. 

“Okay, who stole Peebee and put you in her clothes?” Ryder joked. 

“Not funny,” Peebee answered in the same tone as before. 

“It’s a little funny,” Ryder egged her on. 

“ _Okay_ , it’s a little funny,” Peebee said rolling her eyes. “I received this.” 

“Hey babe! Sorry I broke your pet. It lacked versatility. Couldn’t keep up. Maybe I’ll do the same with your other new toy. Ta,” Ryder could recognize Kalinda’s voice all too well. Fuck, she wished she had stayed in bed. 

“She means you. I hate her,” Peebee said glowering. 

“Really? Are you sure about that?” Ryder knew all too well that sometimes people would say what they might regret later. 

“Oh I don’t know. It’s not that she took my bot and broke her. We got POC back and I repaired her better than ever. Now my scanner’s fully upgraded and sweeping the cluster for Remnant signals. We won,” Peebee explained and pumped her fist into the air weakly at the end. 

“So…what’s the problem,” Ryder was confused. She thought all of that would make Peebee happy. 

Peebee was starting to pace. That was never good. “It’s just — drummed up feelings I thought I’d put behind me. Turns out I just buried them. This is what happens when you let people in — you acquire baggage. I travel light, damn it. No baggage.” 

“Letting people in can be life changing — in the best way. In a never-been-done way,” Ryder tried arguing. 

“I want to, but…also I don’t. That’s the problem with strings — too complicated. I let Kalinda become important to me. Look where that ended up. Now you’ve become — you’re becoming — important. But you need to know I resist checking out of the hotel every day.” 

She was becoming important to her? What the hell did that mean. But before Ryder could actually say that, she decided against it and simply retorted, “With accommodations like these, I don’t blame you.”

“You are funny,” Peebee laughed. “I just need a little space. Time to think. Hopefully my new Rem-Tech infused scanner will pick up something amazing and make all the Kalinda trouble worthwhile.”

Ryder didn’t quite know what Peebee needed to think about, but she didn’t really want to know. If this mean she might be leaving…Ryder definitely didn’t want to think about that reality.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Things are starting to get heated! Warning for angst~
> 
> Also if there are any warnings that people would like, please let me know and I'll do what I can to accommodate. I will have warnings for any major triggers but if there are any that you have, let me know.

“Where’s Peebee?” Ryder asked as she was reloading her shotgun and adjusting the clip. Drack was repositioning his armour. She was rather confused why Peebee wasn’t gearing up and rambling off her theory on what they were going to find. 

“Haven’t seen her,” Drack shrugged. 

“You really do care don’t you,” Ryder said sarcastically. 

“Look, that little fireball is just fine. She obviously got distracted by something. Or is still talking to someone about Remnant,” Drack replied. 

“Fine. Wake up Peebee. Your mystery signal awaits,” Ryder said through their comms. 

“Uh, right, okay yeah,” Peebee said clipped. Which was odd. “Actually could you come here please? My place. Straightaway.” Huh, she wasn’t even speaking in run-on sentences right now. Just short phrases. Ryder definitely needed to go and check in on her. 

“Hey Kallo. Any chance of finding a place to land?” Ryder checked before answering Peebee.

“Not yet. Might take awhile,” Kallo replied.

“Okay Peebee. Be right there.”

“This’ll be interesting,” Drack chuckled. That little Asari always cracked him up. He couldn’t wait to see what mess she had gotten herself into this time. 

“Peebee?” Ryder asked as she opened up the door to Peebee’s place. 

“Back here. I won’t bite,” Peebee said. She was standing in the escape pod with her back towards Ryder. What was she doing in there? Were the scans telling her something? Ryder climbed in and saw Peebee fiddling with her screen.

“What’s this about?” Ryder asked.

“Kallo won’t find a safe place to land the Tempest,” Peebee quickly said. When Drack finally climbed in she quickly hit a button and grabbed a seat. Then with a quick tap, the doors shut and she quickly buckled herself. “And safety first!”

A rush of adrenaline coursed through Ryder’s body and she also buckled herself down. “You keep me on my toes Peebee.” This is part of why Ryder loved spending time with Peebee. She never knew what to expect because Peebee was such a wild, impulsive card. 

“That’s one way to put it.” Drack muttered with a grump. This landing was going to rattle his bones. This was the opposite of what he wanted. But this was his only way to get out of his physical evaluation with Lexi…

“I’m not doing this for the fun of it. The Tempest can’t go where we need to be, and you can’t get there from the ground. This is the only way in,” Peebee quickly blurted out. She was feeling incredibly anxious if the two of them were still going to follow through and get the signal with her. She was betting on it. 

“ _In?_ Where exactly are we going?” Ryder asked starting to regret her initial reaction of excitement. This was a completely foreign planet, where exactly where they going. 

Peebee sat quietly and started whistling. 

“Peebee….where are we going?” Ryder pressed again. This was not good. If Peebee wasn’t saying anything that couldn’t be good. Fuck were they going. 

“It’s not my fault the signal’s coming from inside a volcano! And we should land on stable ground, assuming my subterranean scans are accurate. And the impact doesn’t alter trajectory too severely. And —” Peebee quickly started rambling. 

“And tell me you have a plan for getting back to the Tempest,” Drack asked with very little hope that Peebee had actually thought this through. He decided that as long as he had the chance to shoot something this mission counted as a success in his book. 

“Is that a thing? We came all the way to another galaxy with no “plan” for getting back home,” Peebee defended herself. She took a quick look outside. They were almost there! “All right. Brace for impact!”

The pod skidded across the surface and rolled over onto its side. Ryder was currently unimpressed. This was not how the mission was supposed to go. Not to mention her head was pounding. 

“So, uh…are you mad, Ryder?” Peebee asked sheepishly. 

“Mad is the smallest word for what I am,” Ryder slowly said through gritted teeth. This Remnant whatever thing better be worth it. Bless Peebee’s heart and all, but this was not Ryder’s day. 

After they all got sorted out they began striding towards the signal. The planet was bleak with ash falling from the sky and pools of lava scattered on the surface. This was not where they were going to be stuck. Ryder was determined to find this Remnant piece and hope that by the time they did, the Tempest would have found someplace to land. They started off their trek when a ship passed them by overhead. A ship that definitely was not the Tempest. 

“Fuck, I know that ship,” Peebee muttered. “It’s Kalinda’s.” How did fucking Kalinda know to follow her here. When was she going to leave her the fuck alone?

“Pelessaria are you tracking that sweet, sweet signal too?” Kalinda interrupted her comms just to fucking tell her that? Peebee was starting to regret so much. 

“Ugh Kalinda, back off. It’s mine,” Peebee snapped. “How the hell did you find us?”

“Guess you didn't notice the little transmitter I hid in POC. So sloppy. Ta!” Peebee’s jaw dropped. How did she miss it? How the fuck did she miss it? Ryder squeezed her shoulder in a reassuring way. She knew Kalinda always threw her off. Ryder’s blood was beginning to boil. Not to mention they were already having a hell of a time fighting off the Remnant bots, they really didn’t need to throw Kalinda’s crew in the mix. 

After a long fucking battle they managed to catch up with Kalinda and both Asari stared intently at the piece of Remnant tech they both were itching to get. They were shooting off a few of her men when Peebee peaked her head from where they were kneeling, “Kalinda’s about to get the device!” She shot up and started running after her just as Ryder was going to tell her to sit her ass down and hold tight. She better not get fucking shot. 

“You’ll never make it Kalinda!”

“Too late babe, it’s mine.” 

They both ran up to the edge of the structure with nothing but hot lava steaming below. The distance between the platform they were on and where the device was. Ryder stared at them. They weren’t going to try and…jump it were they? Oh. There they go. Fuck. 

—

There had been a choice. Ryder had a choice of shooting at Kalinda or helping rescue her and for whatever reason she chose to help rescue her. No no, it wasn’t for whatever reason. She knows the reason. Peebee had asked, had told her she didn’t want Kalinda to die. She didn't know their story, but what if it had sparked something? How could Ryder not listen to what Peebee wanted? Fuck. 

She hadn’t had a chance to talk to Peebee alone after the mission and honestly she wasn’t ready to. The clock read 11:18 pm. Good. She could pretend she’s tired if Peebee decided to come by. No, this wasn’t good. The feeling in her chest, she knew what this was. Jealously. And heartache. This isn’t good at all. This wasn’t supposed to be happen. What the fuck was she going to do? 

The shirt and pants Ryder wore that day were torn off and replaced with her comfortable lounge wear. She collapsed in bed and stared at the ceiling. She had fucking feelings. No no, she definitely had feelings for Peebee. She had feelings for an adorable, noncommittal Asari with the attention span of a goldfish. This couldn’t happen. 

This wouldn’t happen. 

As much as she might want it to happen, she knew Peebee didn’t want anything with strings. Peebee made that perfectly clear last time. Well, last time feelings weren’t present and it’s not like anything had happen.

But saying something right now might change things. It just wouldn’t change in the direction that Ryder would hope for. If she said anything about any feelings for Peebee, Peebee would have her bags packed and gone by the end of the night. If she wanted to keep Peebee and her eyes in her life, she would have to repress the hell out of any feelings for her. 

Slowly Ryder lifted the photo frame and stared at her family. “Hey guys. I had a pretty big day. I wish…you all were here. I could use some advice on what to do because I don’t quite know how to handle this situation. I think I know what I’m going to do but it’s now what I want to do.” She stops talking and runs her fingers over the glass. She did have other family she could talk to. Maybe tomorrow she’d have a talk with someone in the crew and get their advice. 

Ryder sighed and desperately tried all night to sleep.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh the drama~*~*~*~ Hope you enjoy! Sorry it took me so long to update! It was a busy snowy weekend!

The next morning Ryder quickly walked down to the repair room and knocked on Vetra’s door. A grumble came from the other side of the door as Ryder waited impatiently. The door slid open and Ryder walked in before Vetra had a chance to say anything. 

“Fuck, Ryder it’s fucking 6:30am. We don’t have anywhere to be today. It’s our day off. What’s this about?” Vetra muttered. 

Ryder paced for a moment and then sat down on the edge of Vetra’s bed. 

“I don’t know what to do,” she said quietly. 

Vetra let out an aggravated sigh but stopped when she took a quick look at Ryder’s face. 

“I’m only going to ask one more time and then I’m going back to sleep. Then you can wake me up when you’re ready to talk. So, what’s this about?” 

Ryder gave her a small smile. She liked how upfront and direct Vetra always was. This is why she came to talk to her. 

“I…need advice.”

“Really? The pathfinder is coming to me for advice? Are you looking to selling something on the black market? Because I can get you some really shifty buyers.” 

“Ha ha. No, nothing like that. Okay. I’m going to go a bit vague because emotions make me uncomfortable. Which I think we’re both okay with so here goes,” Ryder started up.

“What if you had a friend who had feelings for someone but they knew if they confessed their feelings that someone would never want to see them again? 

Vetra started to laugh and Ryder just stared at her incredulously. “Um, excuse me? I didn’t come in here for you to just laugh at me. What’s so fucking funny.”

“Well first off, I think it’s hilarious that the pathfinder, for whatever reason, is coming to little old me for love advice. Because apparently I have such a great track record with it. And second, I think it’s equally hilarious that the pathfinder, for whatever reason, has decided to crush on the most noncommittal individual on this ship. This all almost makes up for the fact that you woke me up at an ungodly hour,” Vetra listed off. 

Red rushed to Ryder’s cheeks and she started stammering, “N-no! I did not! You’re the one that’s crushing on—“ She stopped and just sighed. “How did you know it was her?”

“Well I wasn’t 100% sure until now. Not to mention, you don’t notice how you treat Peebee. I don’t think she really notices honestly, she’s so trapped in her head and her thoughts all the time.” 

“Do you think anyone else has noticed?”

“Oh I don’t know. They might be more concerned with the Kett and their overlord Archon who’s trying to obliterate all the species in the Andromeda galaxy, but yeah you’re right, maybe everyone did notice.”

Ryder gave her an eye roll and let out a frustrated groan. “This is so stupid Vetra. You know what she’s like. What the fuck do I do?”

“You know what she’s like too. The minute emotions start getting involved she could run out on you. So way I see it there are two things you can do. One, tell her how you feel and she runs off with her impressive knowledge of the Remnants or two, get over your feelings so she sticks around. And well who knows, if you do say something I guess there’s a chance she might stay but I really don’t know the odds.”

“Yeah, that’s what I was worried about.”

“What did you think I would say? I don’t know what else you thought I could tell you,” Vera asked confused.

“I don’t know. Maybe you would just tell me actually there’s a chance she would stay or reject me and stay,” Ryder says with a shrug. “I was just hopeful.” 

“Sorry boo.” 

“Don’t call me boo.”

Vetra chuckled. “But seriously what do you see in her? Because if I had known that spastic aliens that are going to run away at any sign of attachment was your fetish I would have started acting like that ages ago.” 

“You know what? You can take your kink shaming and shove it,” Ryder said as she grabbed a pillow off the bed and wacked Vetra with it.

—

For the next week, Ryder avoided Peebee entirely. She found any and every excuse to stay at the Nexus running small errands or trying to solve problems like why was it that certain panels kept fritzing? And honestly she felt miserable by the end of it. She missed the team, she missed the Tempest, she missed exploring planets and discovering new alien tech. Ryder tried to avoid any thoughts of missing Peebee, but it would occasionally zip into her mind and she would start feeling even more miserable. 

A beep came from her computer and she groaned. She had been avoiding reading her messages for the entire week. Maybe it was time to just take a look, no one was really expecting her to reply right away. Ryder got up and sat down at her desk and started scrolling. This was a bad idea. She felt even worse now. There wasn’t a single message from Peebee. Nothing about what she was currently working on. Nothing about where she was. Nothing about Kalinda. Nothing. 

This was stupid. She was being stupid. Emotions were stupid. With an aggravated sigh Ryder tried to think about what she did last time she was getting over heartache. It was so long ago that it took her a minute to recall that memory. Last time she had just gone on a bender and had a few one night stands. That had helped. Maybe it’d help now. Alright. Ryder sent a quick email to Vetra inviting her out tonight to the Vortex. 

As she waited for a reply, she was going either way, Ryder started looking through her closet for her tightest possible dress. She finally picked out a metallic gold dress that really showed off her cleavage. As she was fixing up her makeup and curling her hair, there was a knock at the door. SAM let her know that Vetra had arrived. 

As Vetra walked in she takes a look at Ryder and whistles. “You clean up good. I thought we were just going for drinks.”

“We are. And then I’m going to bring someone home tonight. That’s my plan,” Ryder explained. 

“Ah. Is that how you humans get over unrequited love?”

“Hey. No one said anything about love,” Ryder said scowling. 

Vetra shrugged. “Alright alright. I’ll be your … what’s the phrase? Wing man. I’m so great at it.” 

“You’re right. How can I say no to you??? Why don’t we just make out now?” Ryder remarked with sarcasm.

“Well with your endless gestures of romance how could I possibly say no?” 

“Great. Let’s get those drinks.”

The two of them walked over to the Vortex and sat down at the bar. They grabbed a few drinks and started eyeballing the others around. There was an empty pit at the bottom of Ryder’s stomach but she just continued drinking until she didn’t notice it was there. She was going to drink to forget. And then take someone home to help her forget. Which, in the corner sat a gorgeous Asari in a stunning red blouse with tight black leggings. She nudged Vetra and head tilted towards the Asari. 

“You are so predictable Ryder. Alright, want me to go over there and talk you up? Although honestly, I’m sure if you go yourself and just say ‘I’m the pathfinder’ her blouse will pop open,” Vetra said with a grin. 

Ryder rolled her eyes. “I’ll see you in the morning.” 

She walked right up to the Asari and leaned forward, trying to push her breasts forward. She gave her a grin and introduced herself, “Hi. I’m Ryder. You are?”

The name immediately drew in the Asari and she also leaned forward. “I’m Zaphrya.” Zaphrya bit her lip and reached out to gently stroke Ryder’s hand. Ryder couldn’t help it and leaned forward, kissing her. When the Asari kissed back, Ryder wrapped her arms around her waist and brought her in closer. 

—

Peebee had been working non stop for days trying to perfect her latest piece of rem-tech. And she was getting so close. Although she wasn’t actually sure what day it was, the lack of sleep was starting to blur the past few days all into a singular day. Suddenly POC gently tapped her shoulder and Peebee’s head snapped back up. “Thank you POC! I promise I’ll sleep soon, or at least nap to get me through today. Or maybe I need some of that coffee I see Ryder drinking all the time. It’s the human beverage that helps them wake up right? Maybe there’s some brewing somewhere on this ship.” Peebee stood up and opened up her pod. She realized it was dark throughout the ship…wasn’t it still morning? 

“Hey a few of us are going down to the Vortex, want to join Peebee?” Drack shouts from across the hallway. “You’ve been cooped up in your room for a week Peebee. Come out and get some fresh air with this geezer.” 

“You know, you make such a compelling argument old man. This will be exactly like going to drinks with my dad.”

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t just compare me to an Elcor. And you’re going to pretend you just offered to buy me a round of drinks.”

“Super.”

The two of them walked down and snipped at each other. “So what have you been doing up in your room for the week?”

“You know, I’m still trying to process that it’s been a week. It’s felt like two days. No wonder I’m exhausted. Just working on some Rem-Tech.” 

“Okay kid, let’s get you a few drinks to relax so you can get some sleep tonight, ya hear?”

“Yar.” 

When they walked in they saw Vetra and immediately walked towards her. They ordered a round of drinks that only Drack could pronounce. And also only Drack knew how to make. Peebee grabbed her drink and started chugging it down until it started to burn the back of her throat. She coughed and turned away, noticing a pair tonguing each other down in the corner of the club. Wasn’t that….Ryder? Peebee watched as Ryder grabbed the Asari’s hand and started walking out of the club with her. She fell quiet and tried to shake off whatever feeling was getting ahold of her. What did Ryder’s personal life matter to her? It didn’t. None of this did. She turned away from the scene and refocused on her drink. 

“Are you okay kid?”

“Yeah, why do you ask?”

“Well you haven’t said anything in the past five minutes. So I just assumed you had finally fallen asleep.” 

“Shut up Drack.” 

He let out a low chuckle and chugged his entire drink in one go. Peebee looked away and just stared at her drink. “I actually think I’m going to go back to the Tempest for some sleep. Thanks Drack.” 

“Any time. See you in the morning.” 

Peebee transferred some credit and quickly exited the club, trying to level herself out. No, no she needed to throw herself back into her work and step away from whatever miserable feeling was trying to get ahold of her. She stormed into her pod and slammed the door. She grabbed her tools and started fidgeting with the item on her work station. How could she be jealous of some Asari she had never met? Now she just needed to adjust these few screws and maybe it’d stay together. How could she be jealous? Don’t you become jealous if you’re attached to someone? She wasn’t attached to anyone here. It felt like a lie, but Peebee worked so hard to convince herself. She definitely wasn’t attached to Ryder. Attracted, sure, but who wouldn’t want to sleep with her? No, she shook her head and continued working at her project. 

—

Ryder grinned at the gorgeous Asari lying in her bed. She slowly shimmied out of her dress so Zaphyra could get a nice, long look at her. “Get into bed. Now,” the Asari said impatiently. Ryder chuckled and continued to take her time as she walked up to the Asari. “On my ship, I’m the one that gives orders.” 

Zaphyra laughed lightly and wrapped her arms around Ryder’s waist. “Then you need to get in bed and order me around Ryder.” She leaned in and pulled Ryder into an incredibly intoxicating kiss. Their tongues meshed together as she climbed into bed on top of the Asari. Ryder pulled away, winked at her, and slowly started kissing down her beautiful blue chest. For a moment Ryder closed her eyes and pretended she was with Peebee. 

But only for a moment.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So because it's my birthday I thought I'd post today to just celebrate a little bit. I'm so excited that I decided to try this out and do some writing. Thanks for reading so far. <3

Morning crept through the blinds and Ryder groaned quietly. She forgot to shut the blinds. She muttered about them to SAM to help assist in shutting them. Ryder rolled onto her side and stared at the Asari for a moment. She sighed quietly and removed herself from bed. As she stood up, her head pounded and she gasped. Fuck. It’s been ages since she’s had a fucking hangover. Stumbling into the bathroom she grasped the bottle of painkillers and quickly downed them. Ryder then splashed water onto her face before putting on a robe and walking outside of her room. Time to get some breakfast. 

Ryder rubbed her eyes as she walked into the kitchen and bumped into Peebee. They both stared at each other awkwardly for their own personal reasons. 

“Um, morning Peebee. How have you been? I haven’t seen you in awhile,” Ryder began. 

Peebee shrugged. “Oh you know me. Just working away on another project!” She turned away and pretended to be looking for something, jam, she decided she was looking for jam. 

“That’s great. Do I have to wait until you finish or are you able to talk about it?” Ryder asked hesitantly. She didn’t want to push Peebee. She seemed off today. 

“Not right now. I’m almost done. I’ll see you!” Peebee quickly blurted out before dashing out of the room leaving Ryder flabbergasted. Did she have something on her face? 

Vetra walking into the room. “Morning lady killer.” 

Ryder rolled her eyes. “Morning.” She groaned quietly as the headache came back. 

“Hungover? Oh Ryder. Our pathfinder is supposed to be able to handle her booze.” 

“Would you mind not screaming in my ear?” Ryder whispered quietly. 

Vetra rummaged around and handed her a strange squishy piece of … fruit? “Just eat it.” 

“What is it?”

“I’ll tell you when you eat it.” 

Ryder didn’t have the energy to argue with Vetra this morning so she quickly threw it into her mouth and started chewing. 

“Swallow. And don’t roll your eyes at me. I’m helping.” 

Ryder swallowed and stuck out her tongue. “What was it?”

“It was a special type of worm found back in the Milky way.” 

Ryder spat out and started clawing at her tongue. 

“Oh relax you big baby. It’s the most effective way to get your head cleared up. Turians eat it all the time,” Vetra said chuckling softly. “How was last night with your friend?” 

“We had a delightful romp if you must know. But I ran into Peebee this morning and she was really weird with me,” Ryder said frowning. 

“Hm,” Vetra said as she took a sip of coffee. “Maybe it has something to do with her seeing you last night with that Asari? She left the Vortex pretty quick after she saw that. But I could be wrong. She could just be having ….a day? I don’t know half the things that pass through that Asari’s head.” 

Ryder spat out her coffee at the thought of Peebee watching her make out with the other Asari.   
—

Peebee quickly darted into her room and locked it. Her heart raced as she stupidly stared at the jam in her hand. Fuck, fuck, fuck. “What the fuck was that Peebee,” she asked herself in frustration. She felt so fucking miserable and she knew exactly why. And who Ryder slept with was none of her fucking business. That was it. She had stayed here way too long and she knew it. Peebee rummaged around the room and found a type of luggage. She started throwing in her clothes and pieces of bots and all her pistols. She couldn’t stay here if she was going to be feeling like this. It was going to be okay, she’d be on her own again but she could still figure out the Remnant’s ticks without everyone on board. As she was packing away she stopped when she noticed a photograph on the floor. It was a photo of the crew. All of them. Jaal and Cora and Liam and Suvi and Kallo and fucking Drack and Vetra and Gil and….Ryder. Her fingers reached out and pressed against the photo. When had she fallen in love with this awkward human being?

At the thought she immediately flipped the photograph over. “No, no. I’m not in love with her, POC. Absolutely not. That’s absurd.” Peebee sat down in the middle of her pod in disbelief. Is that what she was feeling? Love? How could she have fallen in love when not too long ago her heart had been crushed by someone she had loved? How could she make this mistake twice? No. She wasn’t going to make this mistake twice. She wasn’t. It always starts good and then.

And Peebee continued packing away and squeezing everything she could into her baggage. 

Someone suddenly knocked on her door. Oh no. What if it was Ryder? She couldn’t let her in. Fuck knows what she might say to her thanks to her run-on mouth. Not to mention she would immediately know what was going on if she saw the state of Peebee’s room. Maybe if she didn’t say anything whoever it was (please don’t let it be Ryder) would go away assuming Peebee wasn’t in her room but somewhere else. 

Another knock. “Pelessaria, SAM has informed me that you appear to be distressed and may need the assistance of a friend.” Peebee simultaneously sighed in relief and agitation at the sound of Jaal’s voice. Thanks a lot SAM.

Peebee sighed and unlocked her door. “Come in Jaal, but close the door behind you. Thanks.” 

“Oh my,” Jaal commented as he assessed the room. Peebee guilty avoided his gaze. She knew she had been shitty for even thinking of leaving everyone on this ship without even a goodbye. 

“So, Pelessaria. Tell me, what has upset you so?” Jaal said calmly. Of course that’s what this squid alien focuses on.

Peebee frowned and sat down on the edge of her bed. “I’m not sure how to explain it. I just have to leave.” 

Jaal sat down beside her. “Nonsense Pelessaria. I will sit here beside you as long as it takes for you to be able to explain it and I will help you with your problem. There is no need for you to run away.”

In her hands she was holding onto a shirt and started fidgeting with it. If she could barely admit to herself she loved Ryder, how could she tell anyone else? 

“It really isn’t something that you can help me with Jaal. As much as I appreciate the offer,” she softly replied. 

“How about you just tell me how you are feeling in this particular moment,” Jaal offered. 

Peebee groaned. She hated talking about emotions. “Fine! I’m feeling anxious, especially right now. I’m feeling like I want to crawl out of my skin. I’m feeling like I can’t stay in one spot. I’m feeling scared. I’m feeling—”

“What are you scared of little one?” Jaal interrupted. 

She groaned again. Wasn’t it obvious? Peebee rolled her eyes and put her arms into the air dramatically. “I’m afraid she won’t love me back.” Peebee froze and didn't register what she said until after she had said it.

Jaal then let out a soft chuckle and Peebee was so close to punching him in his stupid monocle wearing alien face. “What’s so fucking funny.”

Jaal shook his head and chuckled again. “I should not be surprised that this has to do with love. Love can bring out a lot of strong reactions and force us to do unreasonable actions. I understand why it may frighten you so, especially after what happened with Kalinda.” 

Peebee groaned and put her face into her heads. Oh god, she was getting a lecture on love by an Angaran. This was going to take another 600 years. Jaal sat down beside her and started rubbing her back. “The reason why you have reacted like this is completely understandable Pelessaria. From your position, it would be hard to trust anyone to be able to be respectful and kind towards you, particularly in your situation. You must remind yourself that there is only one Kalinda and that not everyone would react like that. After all you are a special one.” 

She leaned into Jaal a little bit and allowed him to embrace her. He was a good noodle. She needed to hear that. Her anxiety had dropped down a notch.“Thanks Jaal. But what do I do?” 

“You need to talk to her—” Peebee snorted but Jaal continued, “And tell her what resides in your heart. She will either accept what you have to say or reject. If she rejects, I am sure she will do it in a most gracious manner. You must remember, she may be having similar feelings as you are.” 

“If you knew this Pelessaria as well as you think, you’d know she can barely talk about emotions. Let alone to the one she’s interested in. Come on, man,” Peebee exclaimed wacking Jaal at the back of his head. Jaal looked at her with mild irritation. “Sorry,” she quickly added. 

“Hm. Well we will just keep trying to think of another solution. Until then maybe try spending some time with her and get to know her better,” Jaal suggested. “And if you do not mind me asking, but which one is it that you enjoy the company of?”

“Ryder,” Peebee quickly blurted out. Was it not obvious? 

“Bold choice. She is quite the human being,” Jaal commented with approval. He patted Peebee on the back again and she sighed. Being in love was the worst. 

—

After an hour of pacing, Ryder stood outside of Peebee’s room with full intention to just simply check in with her, ask how she was doing, and say absolutely nothing about what Peebee possibly saw. That’s all she was going to ask. But Ryder couldn’t raise her hand to knock. After about 5 minutes Ryder walked away back to her room. She had nothing to feel guilty about. She and Peebee weren’t together. She and Peebee never spoke about any of this. Ryder didn’t even know if she had actually seen what she had seen. Not to mention, last time they had come even close to talking about this Peebee had been very clear that she didn’t want any strings. So she didn’t have to talk to Peebee about this Ryder finally decided. If Peebee had any issues with her she could come talk to her, at this point she didn’t owe her anything. 

Ryder got up and went to her desk to check her email. She replied to who she could and for the others she flagged them. After finishing that she wasn’t sure what else to do. It was their day off and she needed to get something done. She couldn’t handle staying on the ship all day. That’s it, she was going to go to the Nexus and just walk around, maybe do some shopping. They could always use another shotgun right? Or maybe it’d be better to pick up several pistols. 

As she opened the door, there stood Peebee about to knock. Her heart raced a bit quicker and she swallowed. “Hey Peebee! Saw you starting up a new project. How’s that going?” Ryder asked hoping to ignore the awkwardness she was feeling. 

Peebee’s breath stilled as her heart beat a bit faster looking at Ryder. She had been so kind and patient towards her when many others disregarded her. Wrote her off. But Ryder didn’t. In her life so far, she hadn’t met an individual that was…

She was thinking about what Jaal had told her. And there had been so many opportunities to say something to Ryder, but every time fear crept into Peebee. It ensnared her and she realized her “short” life so far would roughly be the age when Ryder might…die. And if Peebee manages to keep her head attached to her body, then the rest of her life would be without Ryder. For a moment Peebee tried to imagine her day tomorrow without Ryder— her chest was tightening. If she spent even more time with Ryder and got entangled further into her life, it would be even more painful when she would be ripped away from her. She wanted to say something to her. 

“It’s coming along. Just need one more piece. The navpoint for it keeps fluctuating but it’s somewhere on Elaaden. That insufferable heat bucket of hell,” Peebee grumbled. Her heart tightened.

She couldn’t. 

Ryder blinked in surprise, was Peebee acting like nothing had happened because nothing had happened or was she just a really bad at reading people? 

“Since you’ve been really great at picking up Rem-Tech for me before, I was wondering if we could go and quickly pick it up,” Peebee suggested but still avoided looking directly at Ryder. 

“Oh, yeah sure,” Ryder said. 

“Sweet! We land in half an hour. See you soon!” Peebee smiled and ran off. She closed her pod and sealed it shut. She crumpled to the floor. What was going on? Why was she so hellbent on not letting this go. Peebee rolled her eyes at herself. She knew why. Peewee bit her lip. The image of Ryder taking the other Asari’s hand popped into her head. Ryder had moved on. Hadn’t she? Had she ever actually been interested? Was it just better to shut her trap before complicating everyone’s lives?

Being in love was the worst. Peebee was definitely going to put that on a t-shirt one day.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a little bit more! Have fun with it! xoxo

Okay. So here goes. Peebee was pacing nervously. She couldn’t shake her feelings. Maybe they could start off small? Now she was stuck trying to find this made up piece of Rem-Tech. Peebee sighed. She was struggling. Maybe she thought that if the two of them went on a mission together, they could somehow talk about….things. Peebee was geared up and ready to go. As they approached Ryder joined her and they waited to land. 

Stepping into the sandy landscape, the sun beamed harshly at them. A few seconds in and already sweat was gliding down the side of Ryder’s face. Wretched hell bucket. They investigated the area before finding a data pad leading them to another destination. Peebee and Ryder climbed back into the Nomad and started driving towards the navpoint. 

“Hey Peebee, are you alright?” Ryder asked with slight concern. 

Peebee blinked with surprise. “I’m sorry, what?”

“Are you okay? You just have…been so quiet today. Which don’t get me wrong is bad or anything, it’s just not you,” Ryder answered. Was Ryder going to have to spell it out for her? Was Peebee really upset about what she had seen the other…

Ryder was so caught up in her thoughts that she didn’t notice the wind pick up dramatically. 

—

The Nomad flipped over and landed on it’s side. _Fuck, didn’t think it could actually be flipped over._ Ryder managed to unbuckle herself. “Peebee? Hey are you okay?” Ryder quickly asked and tried twisting around to take a look at the backseat. Peebee was knocked out and she had a decent gash running across the side of her head. Shit shit shit. Ryder fumbled around and tried as quickly as she could to open up her door. She scrambled to open up the side door so she could have better access to remove Peebee from the Nomad. The engine was starting to smoke. 

Ryder grabbed her omnitool and started hacking away at the seatbelt. After she managed to cut it through, she hoisted Peebee out of her seat. She gently laid her down beside the Nomad and watched her breathing. Okay she was okay. Peebee had just been…knocked out. Which also wasn’t great. Lexi was going to have a fucking field day with Ryder. She shook the thought away and knew she needed to focus on getting Peebee and her out of this blasted sandstorm. As they’ve been exploring Elaaden, Ryder noticed several caves along the ride. Maybe a cave would be a good place for shelter for now? 

“SAM are you able to send a message to the Tempest?” Ryder asked.

“Negative Pathfinder. The storm is producing too much interference for me to be able to have a direct line of communication. We may have to wait until the storm settles.” Well fuck. 

“SAM are you able to check on how Peebee is doing? Is she hurt anywhere else?” Ryder knew too well that she didn’t want to move Peebee more than she had to. She could very well have hurt her back or even her spine. 

“Peebee has a concussion, several cuts, bruises and her left arm is sprained,” SAM diagnosed. Ryder quickly grabbed the emergency first aid kit from the Nomad and started putting together a sling for Peebee’s sprained arm. Ryder picked Peebee up and started walking away from the blazing sun. The wind was picking up and Ryder was finding it more difficult to walk forward, but there was a cave coming up. Or she thought it was a cave. She supposed it could be a fiend. Ryder sighed. With her luck it would be a fucking fiend. 

As Ryder walked further and further, it became clear it was thankfully not a fiend but a cave. At least they had a place to hole up until communications were back online. Ryder laid Peebee down behind a large boulder. She figured it’d be good to have some shelter incase the sandstorm whipped far down into the cave. Ryder sat down beside Peebee and leaned back against the boulder. Okay. Time to take a breather. 

After awhile Peebee started to stir. A yowl came from her as she started to regain consciousness and was hit with a wave of pain. Everything from her head to her feet was aching. She felt utterly bruised. And there was just a specific pain radiating from her arm. She groaned as she opened her eyes and looked over. 

“Hey there Peebee…how are you feeling?” Ryder asked hesitantly. 

“I…pain. I’m in pain,” Peebee replied. “Where are we? Where’s the Nomad?” 

“Um, well we were flipped over. So the Nomad’s pretty beat up. It’s not far from here. We just need to wait out the storm then we’ll have the Tempest send a dispatch to take us back,” Ryder informed her and gave her a small smile. 

“Oh. You carried me here? Why didn’t you wake me? I can still walk. Far as I can tell my legs are only bruised,” Peebee said with a huff. 

“Well, you had a concussion. So I didn’t want to make you feel any worse,” Ryder answered. 

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to snap.” 

“It’s okay. You’re in pain. I understand.”

“That’s no excuse. Either way, sorry,” Peebee looked around and sighed. “So we’re stuck here hey? What for a few hours? Days? Months?” 

“The storm should clear up in a few hours Pelessaria,” SAM noted. 

“Well we have a few hours to kill. Wanna play truth or dare?” Peebee teased. 

“Um, no. I need you to rest. You took quite a hit,” Ryder said with a scowl. “Not to mention you didn’t finish telling me what’s upsetting you so much.” 

“There’s nothing that’s—”

“Bullshit. That’s bullshit.” 

“Alright, alright. Lexi knocked me up.”

Ryder was starting to fume. She had been through so much already today and had to walk in the blazing sun, she was so close to losing it. 

“Why is it, that you can never be real with me?” Ryder asked quietly. “Why is it, that you think you can punish me for something that’s really none of your business?” 

“Im not—“ 

“Oh for fuck’s sake,” Ryder was trying to still her mind and stop but she couldn’t. “You know that everyone on this team is here for you. You know that I am here for you. Ever since you came on board you’ve held everyone at an arm’s length and have only let us in now and then. And it’s exhausting not knowing if you are or aren’t going to stick around. We’ve shown you that we’re not going anywhere. We’ve shown you that we support each other, go on missions not related to what I need to do because we know it’s important to someone on board. We like you no matter what you decide to do. But stop shutting us out. I miss my friend.” 

Peebee’s jaw gaped at her and she quickly shut it. Ryder was right. She knew it. Shame overcame her and Peebee looked away at Ryder. She wasn’t sure what to say. There was so much she wanted to say but she didn’t know where to start. “I’m sorry,” Peebee said softly. But Ryder didn’t hear it over the severity of the wind blasting outside the cave. 

“I need a moment,” Ryder said walking off. “I’m just going to step outside.” Ryder couldn’t deal with Peebee not saying anything. They could have finally had a good, open discussion, but Peebee wasn’t ready. And maybe she never would be. But it also could be her anger talking. She stepped outside and gasped when sand pelted against her face. She adjusted her helmet and tried climbing a little bit. Maybe if she just moved slightly out of the way SAM could reach the Tempest. 

In the mean time Peebee stayed where she was at and just stared at the floor of the cave. Ryder hadn’t raised her voice or said anything that wasn’t true. She didn't owe just Ryder an apology, but everyone else on board. Her heart ached. She didn’t realize that Ryder had been hurting so much. While waiting for Ryder to return, Peebee started coming up with a plan.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had a ton of fun writing this chapter! Enjoy reading! The story ain't done though~~~

Ryder stormed off knowing she needed space otherwise she was going to lose it and she didn’t want to take it out on Peebee. It wasn’t really her fault anyway. She was cranky from the hot weather and from the pain of being tumbled around in the Nomad. It just wasn’t a good day and she should have known better than to try and have a serious conversation with Peebee. The wind whipped around Ryder and she sighed. She just had thought, well, Peebee can’t run away right now. Maybe she would be real and honest. 

The air seemed more still than before but Ryder jumped towards higher and higher ground hoping SAM would ping her once she was high enough. Sure enough, a few moments later SAM pinged her and informed her the Tempest was on its way. 

When the Tempest arrived on, Ryder immediately stepped away from Peebee so that Lexi could deal with her. Ryder was fine for the most part. Probably physically. So she just went into her room on the ship and locked herself in. She was upset. More upset than she thought she actually was. Ryder stepped up to her bed and collapsed. Her fingers drift over her sheets and she sighed. She was going to sleep for a few hours. 

There was banging at her door that startled her. She wasn’t ready to deal with the world. Plus she was able to control the air conditioning in here — Ryder was still feeling the effects of the heat from Elaaden. Ryder stared at her sheets and ran through the other day. Yes, she was upset. But she was upset because she didn’t want to lose Peebee. It was incredible that Ryder got here and met her. It was incredible that they have been slowly putting up outposts. And frankly, it was incredible that _she_ was here. After all, what was the chance that this is what would happen in Andromeda? Her fist tightened. Yes Ryder cared about her, but she wasn’t going to lose Peebee over this. She was going to try and get her friend back. She could absolutely respect Peebee’s no strings Ryder just didn’t want to feel like a stranger to her.

—

Lexi fussed over Peebee for at least an hour and she couldn’t deal with it more than usual. 

“Stop fidgeting so much. I am trying to get a scan so that I can help you,” Lexi grumbled. 

“I am great. I go tumbling in the Nomad all the time,” Peebee muttered back. 

“Well that’s why someone else should drive the Nomad and not Ryder,” Lexi said. She looked through her scan and jotted down some notes. 

“Take this right now and every morning for the next 5 days,” Lexi informed her. 

“Sure, whatever,” Peebee said with a shrug. 

Lexi looked over concerned. “Maybe we need to do a full scan to see if you have a concussion. You normally never agree so quickly.”

“What can I say, you’re persuasive. Can I go now?” Peebee asked. She wanted to get out and try and finish with what she had been planning. 

“No. What’s going on? Is there something else that happened? You seem off,” Lexi said while writing down a few more notes in her file. 

“I don’t want to really talk about it. But I promise it isn’t anything from the Nomad okay?” Peebee said with a sigh. 

Lexi looked at her skeptically. “Fine. But I want you in here within 3 days so that I can reevaluate how well your body has been healing okay?”

“Sounds great!” Peebee said as she ran out the door. She dashed to her room. 

—

“Okay POC. Time to continue with the brainstorming!” Peebee said nervously. She felt like her insides were constantly squirming. Each plan she came up with seemed either too ludicrous or unattainable or just too emotional. She needed help. Peebee sent a quick email to Jaal asking him to come by. She didn’t like dealing with her feelings but Jaal definitely knew how. After brainstorming for a little bit more, the door opened. 

“Alright, what is it my dear blue one?” Jaal asked as he stepped inside. “Oh…all your items are not packed away. I was expecting something quite different.” 

Guilt twisted in her stomach despite knowing that it was just a joke. Ryder’s words rang through her head thinking of the team and how distant she had been with, well all of them. 

“No. I’m done with that. That’s not going to happen again,” Peebee said softly. 

“I did not mean to offend Pelessaria. It was only a jest,” Jaal replied with concern. He walked over and gave her a quick hug. “What is on your mind?”

Peebee smiled at the hug. “During the trip on Elaaden…Ryder kind of got real with me. And I’m trying to work through that. And somehow express myself properly. So I thought I’d ask you for help.”

Jaal beamed at her. “I’m proud of you Pelessaria.” 

“Get out mom,” Peebee said with an eye roll but secretly felt proud too. She weakly pushed Jaal away as he started coming in for another hug. 

“Okay Pelessaria, let’s get started.” 

—

When Ryder checked her messages there were a few recent ones sent to her. All of them from Peebee asking her to come by to her room. She wanted to make amends. Ryder sighed and grudgingly got out of bed. Peebee had every right to be heard out and to explain herself. This hopefully would go better than their last conversation. Ryder put on something decent and walked over to Peebee’s room. She gave it a small knock. 

Peebee was fussing with POC as Ryder walked in. “Hey Peebee—” 

“Hold that thought. Sit tight. Uh, I’ll be right back,” Peebee said nervously. Her stomach was fluttering and her heart felt tight. She quickly darted out of the room and closed the door. Peebee ran to the conference room and waited. That’s all she could do. 

Ryder was confused as to why she was standing in Peebee’s room to talk to Peebee…but she had just run off. Suddenly POC started twitching and a recording began playing. The voice Ryder realized was Peebee’s. 

“Hello — don’t worry, I’m not springing anything terrible on you. Actually you be the judge. I’m just going to come out with it. I want you Ryder. More than friends, more than lovers. I want strings. All the strings. I know I said I didn’t want that before, but things can change. So…at the beep, just let me know. Do you want to be with me for real? Either way, join me in the meeting room, huh? Um…beeeeeeeeeep.”

Ryder’s jaw dropped and her heart fluttered. Was this for real? She glanced around the room. She wasn’t being gagged was she? Peebee said either way. Did Peebee really listen to her when she talked in that cave? 

—

Everyone but Ryder had gathered in the conference room and Peebee paced nervously. She was sure that Ryder was going to show up at any moment. So. 

“So, uh, the reason I wanted to talk to you all—” Peebee started. 

“Uh oh. Did you mutiny and jettison Ryder?” Jaal asked shaking his head. 

“ _Jaal_. I didn’t. I swear,” Peebee whined.

“Ah, no such luck. She just showed up,” Vetra commented. 

Peebee’s heart started beating faster as she looked at Ryder. She felt so vulnerable and worried about what she might say. But she was going to power through no matter what Ryder has decided. She was going to stay. But…to stay and be with Ryder would be…beautiful. 

“She did ambush me, but I survived,” Ryder laughed. 

“No harm, no foul? Huh? I just want to say: Whether you all know it or not, I’ve had one foot out the door since I got here. And, well that’s gonna stop. I’m proud and happy to be part of this team. This... family. That…that’s really it,” Peebee said while fidgeting with her shirt. She really was. Jaal was one example of someone who showed her support when she had never asked for it. She had Vetra, a friend, who would help her prank the others. Cora who showed her respect and space. Liam who she was able to jab at each other. Drack who really didn’t give a shit what she did as long as she could take him to some Kett. And then Ryder. Ryder who saw Peebee as she was and liked her for it. She was lucky to be where she was. 

“About time you caught up, kid,” Drack said slapping her on the back. 

“Yeah, you’re one of us, whether you like it or not,” Vetra added. 

“Well…great. So, uh, my place is still an utter mess from the Kalinda thing— who wants to help me clean it up?” Peebee asked sweetly. 

“Think I left the stove on,” Drack quickly muttered as he headed out of the conference room. 

“I’m making ice,” Liam added as he followed Drack out.

“It’s an Angaran holiday,” Jaal politely added and left. 

“Reports don’t file themselves!” Cora exclaimed. 

“Helping Liam make ice,” Vetra said. 

“But…but…” Peebee started but she stopped as soon as she realized she was alone in the room with Ryder. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. She wanted to bolt so badly. Peebee could hardly stand how long each second creeped by. This is why Jaal thought being in the conference room would be a good idea. Nowhere for her to run. Well not really, but Ryder was standing very near the exit. Peebee waited nervoulsy. 

“So…you got my message?” Peebee asked softly. 

Ryder stepped forward. “I want to be with you Peebee. Only you. If you want—”

There was a surge of warmth that exploded in Peebee and she pounced on Ryder. It felt like the beginning, like that first day they met. Peebee sat on top of Ryder and grinned like a loon. She leaned forward kissing her gently, savouring this moment as much as she could. Her blue fingers intertwined with Ryder’s as they continued kissing. Peebee pulled back and let Ryder sit up. 

“I have a surprise for you,” Peebee said with a grin. She couldn’t stop. 

Ryder raised her eyebrow. “Oh?” 

“Follow!!!”

Peebee grabbed Ryder and started tugging her down into the Tempest. Suddenly she halted and Peebee whipped out a strip of black cloth. 

“This goes on your face,” Peebee said as she immediately reached and tied it onto Ryder’s head. 

“But—”

“It’s called a _surprise_. God Ryder.” Even though she couldn’t actually see, she could imagine the eye roll Peebee was giving her now. Peebee’s hands went onto her shoulders and pushed on her to sit down. There was some shuffling going on and in a moment the black cloth was removed. They were in the engine room that Gil practically lived in but he wasn’t around. The only lights in the room were coming from the engine, soaking the room in an electric blue. The light poured over Peebee making her appear ethereal. Ryder’s heart felt like it was stuck in her throat. 

“This is…” Ryder didn’t know what word would be appropriate. So she just looked over at Peebee. “Thank you. It’s not even close to what I was expecting. I feel like I’m dazed.” 

“Thanks for…seeing me,” Peebee said. “I wanted to do something to show you that I do care. And that I do care about everyone here. I was on my own team for so long, it took me awhile to remember what it actually feels like being part of an actual team.” 

Ryder nodded. “What would you have done if I had said no?” 

“Jaal is waiting in my room with ice cream just incase things go south. And then he said we would journal about our feelings,” Peebee groaned. 

“I think he’s going to make you journal anyway,” Ryder chuckled. 

“He’s the worst. I love him.” 

Ryder smiled at her. Peebee seemed so relaxed and calm now. She glanced down at the table and noticed strange meals that she couldn’t quite place. 

“And this is?” 

“Um, Asari specialities. I tried making a few dishes my mom always made back in the Milky Way. I thought I could share a little of my past,” Peebee answered. She took the napkin and put it in her lap. Peebee helped Ryder load up her plate. Ryder took her hand and gently squeezed it.

“I’m so glad I met you Peebee.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the late update! It has been an exhausting week of work that I just didn't have the time (well, energy frankly) to do much writing the past few days. But I haven't forgotten about my story! It will be 100% finished at some point in time. I can see my ending but I feel like I have a little ways to go. Either way I hope you enjoy! And I'll try to have another update soon!

The dinner went beautifully. Well, at least Peebee thought so. _Well_ , at least Peebee had a good time. Both of them felt so relaxed in each others presence. After eating they walked out onto the Nexus. The night felt still and private. Almost everyone was sleeping but the stars….the stars just shone intensely through the windows. It felt romantic to Peebee. 

Ryder stopped walking and turned to face Peebee. “What made you change your mind?” 

Peebee kicked the ground lightly. “I…” She wasn’t sure if she wanted to tell Ryder the real reason. She wasn’t really ready to face it, and if she was lucky, she wouldn’t have to face it for some time. “I just, I stopped being afraid. Okay, well, not _entirely_ , but enough to go for this. I didn’t want to be hurt again so I just didn’t want to fully connect with you or anyone really. But…otherwise I just, think you’re an incredible human. Out of the humans I’ve met in my life so far, none have made such an impact on me,” Peebee finally replied. This wasn’t a lie. “And…other than Kalinda. No one’s really stuck with me for so long y’know?” 

The wind brushed against the two. Ryder took Peebee’s hand and gave it a light kiss. “No one’s made such an impact on me either. I’m glad I didn’t lose you. It still feels surreal that you’re here and not actually out there,” She admitted. Her voice wavered slightly but Ryder just looked up at the stars and focused there. 

A blue hand picked Ryder’s hand up again and tugged on her to come sit right in front of the large glass. They sat beside each other; Peebee’s hand still holding onto Ryder’s. 

“I did almost leave.” 

A pang rang in Ryder’s chest even though that phrase no longer had any threat to Ryder. Despite that all she said was, “Oh.” What else was there to say to that? 

“Funny enough, Jaal talked me out of it. What a bizarre squid dude,” Peebee continued. 

Ryder raised her eyebrow confused. “How on earth did he manage that?” 

“I don’t fucking know. Either way, he just talked me through it and found me where I was stuck. I’m glad I stayed,” Peebee smiled at her. 

Afterwards they went back onto the Tempest into Ryder’s room. Peebee gathered all the pillows she could find in the room and threw it up against the wall in a very makeshift couch like style. They curled up with each other and laid their foreheads against one another. Everything felt right in their cocoon. 

Everything just felt right. 

— 

For awhile there it felt that everything was right. The outposts were continuing to flourish, the Kett were being managed, the Angarans were becoming more open, and Peebee was great. Ryder felt that she was starting to heal; she was starting to think that they could actually defeat the Kett and start a life here. Ryder rolled over and picked up the photo of her family. She propped it up and smiled. “Morning guys.”

Ryder then grabbed her tablet and checked her messages. She immediately sat up after glancing at one. It made her heart race, it made breathing harder for her, and it made her hands feel weak. _Scott was awake_. 

She jumped out of bed and haphazardly threw on whatever looked clean. Dashing out of her room she ran into Peebee who gave her a look. “Alright babe, what the fuck?” 

If only there was time to be sarcastic back but instead Ryder quickly said, “Scott. He’s awake.” 

Peebee’s big blue eyes widened. “Well, then go go! If you want me to go with you let me know, otherwise I’ll be waiting here for you okay?” She said with genuine concern. 

But Ryder definitely did want to go by herself. She hadn’t seen her brother for so long. Her heart felt a bit lighter just knowing he was back in the world. “Appreciate that. I’m just going to go by myself and then I’ll be back okay?”

There was a quick nod that came from Peebee and Ryder dashed towards the exit. Ryder knew it looked odd just sprinting through the Nexus, but she could barely give a rat’s ass if anyone wanted to say anything to her. No one could take this moment away from her. 

The door’s opened and there was Scott, sitting on the bed with a doctor checking out his vision. A huge grin appeared on Ryder’s face as she slowly walked towards him. “Hey Scott!” 

Scott looked over with a hurt expression on his face. Suddenly Ryder’s heart plummeted and she remembered their last conversation. _Shit_. 

“You lied about dad. You told me he was alive,” Scott said with a heavy tone. He seemed so angry. Didn’t he understand why she lied to him? 

Ryder froze for a moment before walking closer to him with her arms stretched out. “Oh Scott…”

He brushed away her hands and refused to be comforted. Her heart felt like it was slowly being dissolved in the pit of her stomach. She had missed him so much. This isn’t how she wanted their first meeting to go. 

“Why?” He asked with such anger. 

“You…were in a coma. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you, Scott. Not like that,” Ryder tried explaining as she sat down beside her brother. She felt so guilty but what if telling him the truth would have complicated his condition further? What if he went into such a shock that he wouldn’t have woken up? What ifs had been swarming in her head. 

“So wait until I wake up to hit me with it? _That_ was better?” Scott asked. 

Fuck. He was so angry. 

“I figured at least I’d be here for you when it happened,” Ryder replied. 

Scott became quiet for a minute running all this through his head. He let out a soft sigh and wrapped his arms around Ryder. “Come here. It’s just you and me now, sis,” he said gently. It felt so good to be hugged by her little shit of a brother. 

“I know, but mom and dad believed in us. We can do this,” Ryder said. She’s been saying this to herself for months. 

“What’s this rumour I’m hearing you’re the new Pathfinder?” He asked giving her a skeptical look. 

“Dad’s parting gift.”

“Soon as we get my gear. We’ll—” Scott tried to stand up but he looked so unsteady on his feet. Ryder had seen her brother hurt before but now she was terrified of losing him again. He needed his rest before he even thought about joining up with her. 

“Scott, sit, please.” 

“No I’m fine. This was just a small—” Scott started arguing until the doctor stepped in. 

“No way are you for duty, sir. You need a chance to mend,” Dr. Carlyle insisted.

“Yeah? Says who?” Scott shot back. 

Ryder gave a slight eye roll. What a dipshit he could be sometimes. “I know you don’t like being reminded that you’re my little brother, but you are. So relax and let your big sister take care of things,” Ryder said firmly. 

“Fine, fine. More sleep for me,” Scott muttered, clearly upset. He laid back down. “So tell me, what else is going on?

“Oh you know, just the fate of every man, woman, child and everything-in-between facing certain extinction. The usual,” Ryder replied sarcastically. 

“Oh, well, I’m sure the Pathfinder manual covers that,” he jabbed back. Fuck she missed this asshole so much. 

“Yeah, we’ll have it wrapped by lunch,” Ryder said laughing. “There’s a race of aliens called the Kett. They’re led by a scary fuckboy named “Archon” who wants to turn all of us into them.”

“Well that sounds like a delightful time. I can’t wait until we destroy him,” Scott said. 

“And, uh, other fun facts. I met someone,” Ryder mentioned awkwardly.

“You met someone before I had a chance to do a thorough background check on them and interview them?” Scott feigned with shock. 

Ryder gave him an eyeroll. “And here I was considering introducing you but now you’re just going to have to wait and just guess who it is.”

He was beginning to seem tired. Maybe she needed to leave him to rest for now and then continue to catch up with him later. 

“No no, I want to hear!” 

“Nope. I’ll bring her around next time and then we’ll see if you can handle that,” she replied and lightly sucker punched him in the arm. 

“But uh, she’s great. I really think you’ll like her,” Ryder said softly. 

Scott caught her expression and understood what was going on. “I’m glad. But now I’m going to take a nap. Visit me soon sis?” 

“Yeah, I will.”


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, my apologies for the late update. Life's been busy and it's been hard to find some downtime to unwind. So thank you all for being so patient. Enjoy the chapter!
> 
> Heads up that this chapter is NSFW. Some sexy times are happening~

Ryder was _pissed_. She was so close to just punching _anything_. She couldn’t believe fucking Tann. That really was the most unfortunate twist in this new galaxy, that he apparently was their leader. And making some stupid ass decisions that Ryder was definitely not going to follow. She gave out a huff and asked for her team to assemble in the conference room. Her fingers tapped nervously on the table. She knew what she was going to say. Ryder knew what they had to do. But she had to give them a heads up so that if they weren’t comfortable coming along for the ride, well they could easily take a step onto the Nexus. She didn’t want to guilt them into anything. Ryder let out a sigh, she was tired.

The sound of footsteps were booming and suddenly there was a Peebee running at her. But she skidded to a stop. 

“Hey,” Ryder said softly. 

Peebee frowned and stepped slowly towards her. Her hand reached out and gently brushed Ryder’s hair away from her forehead. Her hand cupped her cheek and Ryder closed her eyes with a sigh. Ryder felt Peebee close to her and the world felt quiet. 

“I’m tired,” Ryder said as her eyes opened. Peebee leaned in and gave her cheek a gentle kiss. 

“I know,” Peebee said quietly. “After this, I’m going to draw you up a nice bath and you’re going to relax. Okay?” 

A sigh came from Ryder and she nodded. There was a group of footsteps coming up and Ryder tore herself to compose herself. Time to be professional. Her team surrounded the table and Ryder waved them in.

“Before we get started I just wanted to let you guys know that Hayjer is on the comm to partake in our conversation,” Ryder started. 

“Hey guys. Okay. So, the Nexus leaders think our search for Meridian is a waste of time, but we know they’re wrong. Turning on vaults won’t be enough without the heart of the system. We know this and we need to do something about this since they aren’t going to,” Ryder said. She let that sink in for a moment. 

Cora was the first one that said something, “Just to clarify: You’re defying a direct order?” 

Ryder nodded, “It’s my job to bring us home, and that’s what I’m doing. With or without permission.” 

Drack laughed, “That’s the spirit.” Ryder grinned at him, she knew he was going to be on board. 

“What about the kett?” Jaal asked. 

“Yeah. We thought about it. That’s where the Ghost Storm technology comes in. Isn’t that right Hayjer?” Ryder asked. 

“Exactly Our forged signals should divert some kept from you,” Hayjer chimed in. 

“It won’t be all of them, but it’ll be enough,” Vetra added. 

Her heart was growing and growing as she noticed more of her team signing on board. 

“The Tempest is small and fast. I don’t need a big window. We’ll drop you off and make our exit before the kett catch on,” Kallo added. 

“Once we’re on Meridian, it should be a small team. Move fast, figure out it’s secrets,” Peebee threw out there. 

“Right behind enemy lines. Good time to assess their numbers, defences…” Drack muttered to himself. Bless his little heart, his focus never changes. 

“And when you’re ready, we’ll extract you the same way we got you in,” Kallo said. 

Liam nodded and added, “If we come back with actuals on Meridian? The Nexus will sit up.”

Ryder grinned. Of course her team was on board. She felt a little bit more rejuvenated. “Sounds like a solid plan team. Hayjer you ready?”

“Good to go on your word, Pathfinder.”

“All right guys. This is it. Get a good night sleep and tomorrow at 0600 we’re going,” Ryder finished. 

Everyone muttered softly to each other and started descending. Ryder turned away and stared out into the space. She had no fucking idea what they were going to walk into and that terrified her. How was she going to lead her team into unknown space? Her hand was suddenly being pulled. Ryder glanced over as Peebee’s hand had been wrapped around her wrist. 

“Come.” 

 

She nodded at Peebee and followed her. Ryder felt like she had just blinked and suddenly she was in her room. Peebee shouted at her to take her clothes off as she ran into the bathroom. A gush of water started rushing into her bathtub, Ryder hoped. Slowly she started taking her clothes off. A certain smell started coming from the bathtub and Ryder perked up a little. Lavender? 

“Are you coming?” 

“Yeah, sorry. Lost in my head,” Ryder said shaking her head. She closed her eyes for a moment and breathed in deeply the smell of the lavender. The smell must have triggered something because a calm was starting to wash over her. She stepped into the bathroom where the lights were turned off and the only light was coming from the few candles scattered around. 

“Vetra is amazing at getting really good deals at hard to get items,” Peebee said with an eye roll. 

Ryder smiled at her softly. “This is beautiful.”

“We all can tell you’re getting stressed. You don’t have to shoulder all of this. This is a lot. We are all here to support you and not just have you carry everything. So get in the tub and goddamn relax already,” Peebee explained and pushed her gently towards the tub. 

Ryder slowly sunk into the warm water and closed her eyes softly as Peebee started to massage her shoulders. “You are a saint,” murmured Ryder. 

“You can’t see it but I’m rolling my eyes hardcore,” Peebee replied. 

Peebee’s massage moved from her shoulders to her arms and slowly embraced her. Suddenly Peebee started placing a few kisses down her neck. “If any of this isn’t okay, just say so and I’ll stop,” Peebee said. Ryder shivered from the kisses and nodded. As Peebee was paying attention to her neck, her arms had wrapped around her waist and started fondling her breasts. Ryder let out an involuntary groan. Peebee’s fingers softly pinched her nipples and Ryder gasped, bucking into her hands. 

“Jeez, I knew you all were sensitive, but Ryder,” Peebee chuckled. 

“It feels good, fuck off,” Ryder groaned. 

“Okay,” Peebee said and let go of her. 

“Hey no, I didn’t _actually_ mean fuck off. Come back here,” Ryder said finally opening her eyes. 

Peebee turned around and raised an eye at her. Ryder leaned in closer and kissed her hard. Peebee sighed and brought Ryder closer to her. Ryder’s hands ran across Peebee’s face and finally started undoing her shirt. Peebee’s hands came back to her breasts and Ryder gasped. The way Peebee massaged her breasts and pinched her nipples were causing Ryder to lose herself. Her hands reached out and brought Peebee’s face closer in for a hard kiss. The world stopped for a moment as the kissing became more intense and desperate. 

“I want you to fuck me,” Ryder groaned. 

“As…tempting as that is, we might need to save that for another night. However I do have a lovely alternative in mind. Just close your eyes again,” Peebee said casually. 

Ryder’s eyes closed and she listened as Peebee leaned in closer. She heard her hand go into the water, gave her nipple a quick pinch before exploring further down. Ryder moaned when Peebee’s hand found her pussy. Her hand started gently rubbing her clit. Ryder bucked again and gasped. Fuck. Her hands reached out and gripped the sides of the bathtub. Peebee started sucking on her neck while the other hand started toying again with her nipple and Ryder was starting to lose it from all the stimulation. Her moaning was increasing. She moved her head sideways to kiss Peebee again. And as they gently kissed each other, she felt Peebee’s fingers slowly insert inside her. Ryder cried out. She bucked her hips again as Peebee increased her moments. Ryder cried out as she came and let go of the bathtub. 

“You good Ryder?” Peebee asked with a smirk. 

“Yeah, I’m real good,” Ryder murmured pleased. 

Peebee helped Ryder out of the tub and tucked her into bed where she fell asleep instantly.


End file.
